Taking over the world by doing nothing, brought to you live from the Command Bunker at the Lightning Man World Propaganda Network....Of all the blogs you've ever read, this one is the most recent.
Saturday, May 2, 2009
Small Town Parades Are Fun
As always, Mahatma the Rice Dude was there...
Last Saturday was the annual Rice Festival here in Walterboro. Each year it shrinks and gets worse, due to a crappy economy and a burgeoning gang problem in Colleton County.
Even the parade gets lamer every year. This year there weren't any military units, even though the National Guard armory is 3 miles from the parade route. There were no Anah Temple Shriners with little go-karts. This year, even Waffle House's van was absent.
Of course, all you have to do to be in the parade is be able to fog a mirror and pay the fee, so I could put on my kilt and march alone as my own float as the Walterboro Saint Andrew's Society. Maybe next year...
Highlights from this year's events:
There's always at least one fashion faux-pas at the parade.
You know it's a small town when the Clerk of Court has a float.
Gotta have the religious crazies in the parade with hand-painted signs...
Nothing says Small Town Parade like the truck that sucks the shit out of your septic tank.
And then another religious crazy preaching from the hood of a hearse, being towed by a cherry-picker bucket truck owned by the septic tank guy.
When my daughter played in the band, we went to the Simpsonville parade every year. Brought my two sisters and their families, my mom, just about anyone we could. We always said that we should get my brother (who drives a flatbed truck) to drive us in the parade route and let us throw out candy. No one would care who we were or why we were there, they would all just wave and smile.
ReplyDeleteGotta love the septic tank truck.
The septic tank truck is a new one! I've never seen that in a parade before. How funny!
ReplyDeletethis is classic!!!!!!! if anyone can say they are from or live in jerk water its YOU. i love it all the hearse on the trailer with the preacher, the septic pump truck, the air head hindu rice dude. and if she comes from there and can coordinate thong and shirt, she deserves to be the parade queen. awwwwwwwesome!
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