Wednesday, September 24, 2008

The Worst Kept Secret in America



Well, well, well….in news that isn’t really news, it seems that one Mister Clayton Holmes Grissom, better known as Clay Aiken, has ended worldwide speculation and revealed to all & sundry that yes, indeed, he’s gay.


(insert dramatic pause here)


Well, now that the world has resumed spinning on its axis, allow me to say this: no shit, Clayton. This was a no-brainer. It’s also a no-news non-issue.

Allow me to paraphrase my friend and fellow blogger Wil Whalen, who wrote an open letter on his own blog to Lance Bass. Hey, Clay, everyone already knew, and nobody cares. (http://wherethereswil.blogspot.com/2007/11/open-letter-to-lance-bass.html)

You were so far in the closet that you found next year’s Christmas presents.

Y'know, if you had any sort of sense of dramatic flair you’d have announced it on October 11, which is National Coming Out Day, instead of doing it on a magazine cover.

1 comment:

John said...

Who is this schmuck anyway? I've heard the name, but the only thing I've ever heard about him was that he had a CD or something (but then anybody can make a CD these days) and that everybody liked to say he was gay but nobody "knew for sure"...