Monday, October 27, 2008

Because two eyes are sexier than one...



A Muslim cleric has called for Saudi women to wear a full veil, or nigab, that reveals only one eye, "in order to control seduction", the BBC reported recently.

Sheikh Muhammad al-Habadan said that women in Saudi Arabia are encouraged to use eye makeup and look seductive when allowed to wear a veil that exposes both eyes.(gasp!)

How much of their face Muslim women expose differs from country to country, and is an area of contention. The nigab is more common in Saudi Arabia, but in many Muslim societies women wear a headscarf that covers only their hair, such as a hajib or chador. But I guess that’s not oppressive enough for SaudiSuperMuslims…

So, as usual, someone takes it into their heads to fuck up a perfectly good thing that otherwise was working just fine. Radical Islamic Fundamentalists (RIF’s) have perverted Islam to their own visions and suit their own purposes. Of course, fundamentalist Christians have fucked up Christianity as well. Wait till Jesus comes back (like they all say He is, and supposedly any day now) and boy, will He be pissed. “I said what?” When did I say half the crap you attributed to me in that book of fables?” Anyways, I digress...

Now, I’m not exactly a mullah by any means, (and mullah, literally, means scholar) but from what I gather there’s nothing in the Koran that says women must dress in a burka or nigab. This is some new-school shit developed by asshole RIF’s who thought a modest head covering was just too much available skin, so that graduated to facial veils, and spiralled downwards to virtual mummification.

Pretty soon they’ll just look like castoffs from a Star Wars convention. The Tusken Raider sand-people on Luke Skywalker’s home planet had a rugged sort of burka helmet going on. Princess Leia’s Boushh bounty hunter disguise was rugged yet refined. The Mandalorian battle armor of Boba Fett has a view slit reminiscent of a nigab arranmgement without having to actually see those offensively seductive eyes. Soon enough, though, Islam will be awash in a sea of Darth Vader look-alikes sealed away in layers of black capes and big black helmets, breathing like a respirator on the fritz, and the voice of James Earl Jones will issue forth with “Allah Akbar”.




Y’know, most every Muslim I ever encountered in my myriad travels here and abroad in Europe were decent, mellow, respectful people. Of course, I never went to the scary countries full of angry Muslims with guns trying to kill me. I don’t really have a problem with the bulk of Islam. It’s the RIF’s with their burkas, canings, stonings, honor rapes, honor killings, jihads, and truck bombs that piss me off. And radical fundamentalist cultist pseudo-Christians with messiah complexes with harems in their bunkers, dancing with rattlesnakes and babbling in tongues, well they piss me off too. Never let it be said that I’m not equal opportunity…

1 comment:

jmkwriteswell said...

Holy shit, Steve! (Ha ha! Get it? There are at least 3 jokes rolled into that opening sentence.) I do like your style.

=-)

JMK