Thursday, December 25, 2008

You can tax my left nut too while you're at it

You gotta be fucking kidding me. I don’t need the government, or any governmental babysitting watchdog agency, to tell me I’m overweight. I can look in the fucking mirror and see if I’m overweight. And if I don’t particularly feel overweight or look overweight, then it’s certainly nobody’s damned business but mine.

I know that you’re not reading this yourself, Governor Paterson of the great state of New York, being that you’re blind and all, so make sure you’re translator puts the proper emphasis on the Braille transcripts of my blog when I say, sir, fuck you very much for your brilliant proposal to slap a 15% “obesity tax” on all non-diet drinks sold in your state.

So if I buy a Diet Pepsi for a buck, then a regular Pepsi will run me a buck fifteen. I guess you’ll screw people for sweet tea vs. unsweet tea (like you really needed to give my Carolina cousins an excuse to re-start the Civil War) and what about adding sugar to your coffee in shops and restaurants? A fucking trip to Starbucks is expensive enough without getting further ass-raped in taxes for adding a couple packets of raw turbinado.

Dude, I detest the taste of diet drinks. They taste like pure unadulterated ass. All those artificial chemical sweeteners like Splenda, Aspartame, and their ilk are things that I simply do not wish to ingest. At least I know what the fuck is in high fructose corn syrup. We already proved saccharine caused cancer in lab rats, so what other nasty things can today’s artificial sweeteners cause? Yeah, our kids may have three fucking arms but they’ll be skinnier…

Paterson's budget also calls for a 3% cut in education spending, a $620-a-year tuition hike at State University of New York schools and a $600 increase at City University of New York schools, and about $3.5 billion in health care cuts. State employees again will be asked to forgo their 3% raises next year and defer five days' pay until they leave their jobs. In all, Paterson will propose about $9 billion in cuts, $4 billion in new taxes and fees, and $1.5 billion in nonrecurring revenue. The so-called obesity tax would generate an estimated $404 million a year.

The Paterson administration also announced steps yesterday to expand the state's social services net, including a 30% increase in welfare payments over three years starting January 2010, increased money for food banks and expanded access to the state's Family Health Plus program. Paterson also hopes to make it easier for people to enroll in Medicaid by eliminating face-to-face interviews and fingerprinting requirements.

So you’ll increase the size of your fucking Nanny State governmental handouts and make it even easier for fraud to occur by not fingerprinting people, um, like, say illegal fucking aliens, and pay for it by jacking people for a regular Coke and shitting the educational system.

Man, what a fucking asshole. The people of New York were better off with Spitzer. At least he was fucking whores and not the people.

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