Taking over the world by doing nothing, brought to you live from the Command Bunker at the Lightning Man World Propaganda Network....Of all the blogs you've ever read, this one is the most recent.
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
The Return Of Muammar & Fitch
Is there a special Gap or Abercrombie store where you go to buy tinpot dictator clothes? Maybe Banana Republic? (thank you, I’ll be here all weekend…try the veal!)
I ask because I just don’t quite get the fashion sense of Muammar Khaddafi. The dude looks like total shit these days, clothes notwithstanding. It’s like he’s become the love child of Gene Simmons and Mickey Rourke, and not the 9½ Weeks Mickey, but this latest incarnation that looks like a burn victim. But really, where does MuMu get these outfits?
You’d think that a guy who’s been a dictator for some 25 or 30 years would fancy himself a General or Field Marshal, but not our MuMu…he still thinks he’s a Colonel. I’m really curious as to what all those medals signify, too. I mean, shit, did he just send one of his bootlickers to the Interwebz to buy whatever was colorful to fill up his Salad Bar?
(Salad bar…for you civilians, that’s what we military types call the rows of ribbons on our dress uniforms. Real medals are called “gongs”.)
MuMu not only has an impressive collection, but some tailor fashioned them into a cloth patch so they could sew the damned things onto everything MuMu owns. Robes? They’re on there. A leftover suit from Miami Vice? On there. And not just the ribbons, but his little Lee™ Press-On Maps of Africa. Always on there.
Look, Mooey….when you come over here to pitch your Bedouin tent in the Jersey burbs like it’s some bullshit camping trip, send that fruity-looking buck-toothed son of yours to the mall in Paramus to get you some fresher gear. I know the kid is busy getting your pet terrorist Megrahi all settled into his new Al-Queda Apartment, but let’s update the look, shall we?
And now.....the new stuff!
Saturday, March 19, 2011
State of the Blog Address: March 2011
As you may have noticed, productivity is down as of late, and I do apologize. Not that there isn't lots to write about but by the time I get to sit down & do it, it's either old news or the rest of you have already written about it and that kinda kills the buzz about a topic *grin*
Time has been short. There's only two guys in my department and the guy who is ostensibly in charge tends to sit back and let me handle damn near everything, kinda like we reversed roles, so my free time is limited on many days. Now, as you may have noted along the way reading this site that in general I avoid talking about my job except in generalities. One never knows who might read my stuff...but he's only my boss for another couple of weeks and being that he's 90% computer illiterate I think I'm pretty safe. Anyway... my department at work is being shut down under orders from the Mexican company that owns us. (Remind me later to write about Big Dairy, okay?) We've been promised jobs over at the main plant though. We shall see.
But either way, I'll soon be done working at 20 below zero.
Yeah, ice crystals in my facial hair....
What else? Um, a dude pulled in front of my wife on a Honda Gold Wing and she nailed him dead center. He went ass over tea kettle through the air...he literally flew over the car & landed in the road behind my wife's car. He broke his foot, my wife strained some arm muscles, his bike was messed up, and her car was totaled. The picture doesn't really do it justice.
A week or so and some financial wrangling later we replaced it...and we rather like having a convertible. Springtime in South Carolina can be really, really nice. In fact, we broke a record today and hit 87 humidity-free degrees.
Okay, enough about me...on to the blog.
Posts are down. Comments, when I do post, are also down. I think I write more when I get more feedback (HINT! HINT!). Recently though my Black History Month series went over very well. In fact, the series was even featured on the website for the Charleston Tea Party. Go me!
The main site is up to 125 followers/subscribers and there's 86 who follow via Facebook links. I am intensely grateful for all of my readers, and I thank you all from the bottom of my very fiber.
We're at over 240,000 hits and we've been hit from 184 different countries & territories, to include places I didn't even know had the Internet. My latest unique country visit came to me from Bhutan. I'm still averaging a good 400 hits a day, both to my articles and to my crazy pictures. If I had a dollar for every freak who came to my site looking for porn because of the word "Domination" in my blog's name, no....wait, strike that...I want a dollar for every TRUE WEIRDO (often from Muslim nations oddly enough) who comes to my site looking for Octopus Porn", I'd be fabulously wealthy. I kid you not. It remains to this day my most-hit post, the one where I simply mentioned octopus porn because even as jaded as I am, I still hadn't heard of it...
I'm told I have a couple of celebrity readers. It seems that actor Adam Baldwin of the TV show "Chuck" posted one of my articles on his Twitter feed, and I am told that certain members of the Glenn Beck Show staff read my stuff as well. Big thanks to you guys. It gives me a warm & fuzzy to know that people I admire have hit my humble site. And special thanks today go to a visitor I had a few hours ago, who gets the nod for coolest login site in awhile, the Barry M. Goldwater Air Force Range in Arizona. Rock on, dudes.
To date, countries that have hit me include:
Afghanistan, Albania, Algeria, American Samoa, Andorra, Angola, Antartica (seriously), Antigua & Barbuda, Argentina, Armenia, Aruba, Armenia, Australia, Austria, Azerbaijan, Bahamas, Bahrain, Bangladesh, Barbados, Belarus, Belgium, Belize, Bermuda, Bhutan, Bolivia, Bosnia-Herzegovina, Botswana, Brazil, British Virgin Islands, Brunei-Darussalam, Bulgaria, Cambodia, Canada, Cape Verde, Cayman Islands, Chile, China, Colombia, Costa Rica, Cote D’Ivoire, Croatia, Cuba, Cyprus, Czech Republic, Denmark, Dominica, Dominican Republic, Dubai, Ecuador, Egypt, El Salvador, England, Eritrea, Estonia, Faeroe Islands, Fiji, Finland, French Guiana, French Polynesia, Gambia, Georgia, Germany, Ghana, Gibraltar, Greenland, Grenada, Greece, Guadeloupe, Guatemala, Guernsey (island in UK), Guyana, Haiti, Honduras, Hong Kong, Hungary, Iceland, India, Indonesia, Iran, Iraq, Ireland, Israel, Italy, Jamaica, Japan, Jersey (UK protectorate), Jordan, Kazakhstan, Kenya, Kuala Lampur, Kuwait, Kyrgyzstan, Lao People’s Democratic Republic (Laos), Latvia, Lebanon, Libya, Lichtenstein, Lithuania, Luxembourg, Macau, Macedonia, Maldives, Malaysia, Malawi, Malta, Martinique, Mauritania, Mauritius, Mexico, Moldova, Monaco, Mongolia, Montenegro, Morocco, Mozambique, Myanmar, Namibia, Nepal, Netherlands, Netherlands Antilles, New Caledonia (not quite independent yet), New Zealand, Nicaragua, Nigeria, Northern Marianas Islands, Norway, Oman, Pakistan, Palestinian Territory, Panama, Papua New Guinea, Paraguay, Peru, Philippines, Poland, Portugal, Puerto Rico, Qatar, Reunion Island, Romania, Rwanda, Samoa, Saint Kitts & Nevis, Saint Lucia, Saint Vincent and The Grenadines, Saudi Arabia, Senegal, Serbia, Singapore, Slovenia, Slovakia, Spain, South Africa, Sri Lanka, Sudan, Suriname, Sweden, Switzerland, Syria, Tajikstan, Taiwan, Tanzania, Thailand, Timor-Leste, Trinidad & Tobago, Tunisia, Turkey, Turkmenistan, Turks & Caicos, Uganda, Ukraine, Uruguay, Uzbekistan, Venezuela, Vietnam, Yemen, Zimbabwe
I'm gonna keep on pissing off the left. I'm gonna continue to expose their treachery. I shall continue to rail against radical Islam, both here and abroad. I shall continue to support the military. I shall continue to poke fun of the things that need to be poked and to expose idiocy whenever I encounter it. My dear readers, I shall endeavor to write more, and to continue to try & bring you material that is informative and funny. Be well, and thanks again for reading.
Oh yeah.....support that Second Amendment, because it defends the First...
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Sunday, March 6, 2011
So...where's the Left as Sheen melts down?
“Clearly I have defeated this earthworm with my words – imagine what I would have done with my fire breathing fists.”
So Charlie Sheen is nuttier than a squirrel turd and melting down like Chernobyl, hanging out with porn stars, whores, and who knows what else while various ex-wives keep his various kids from him.
Where is Dr Phil and Oprah?
Surely those paragons of leftist psychobabble and touchyfeely crappitude would step forward to help Charlie? Then again, McGraw does whatever Queen O tells him to do and She Who Must Be Obeyed is too busy giving away audience-loads of gifts as she starts her own network that no one wants to watch.
Where is the clergy like Al Sharpton, men of God like Jesse Jackson, great Americans healers like Jeremiah Wright? Surely they'd reach out to help a man in need? Wait....Sheen's white and that don't fly in the Leftist 'hood, even if his daddy is a Liberal icon. Can't play the Race Card and get on TV helping this guy...
Whoopi? Where are you? You have so much to say about everyone, but can you be bothered to stop saying how you're one of only 12 people in history to be an EGOT...ie: you have an Emmy, Grammy, Oscar, and Tony.....more like just a giant EGO.....nah, you can't.
What about that other mouthy bastard, Bill Maher? Surely you'd reach out to help a fellow celebrity? You're so kind & generous like all Liberals, right? No...you're a sanctimonious prick.
An admitted crack user; where is Attorney General Eric Holder? Oh, yeah...he's more worried about his people...whoever the hell they are.
Scion of a liberal family; where's the Prez for a beer summmit? C'mon, Obie...build a bridge to Charlie Sheen's light on the hill, brother.
Bush would have had him over for a crack rock or two. Clinton would have gone whoring with him. Right now he makes Downey look like Mother Theresa and Gary Busey look like Albert Einstein.
You know you're screwed when the only one reaching out to you is Mel Gibson...