Thursday, November 27, 2014

The 12 Days of Lootsmas

Sing along. You know the tune.

On the first day of looting my homies stole for me a 60” HDTV.

On the second day of looting my homies stole for me two Yankees ball caps and a 60” HDTV.

On the third day of looting my homies stole for me three pair of Jordans, two Yankees ball caps, and a 60” HDTV.

On the fourth day of looting my homies stole for me four packs of rolling paper, three pairs of Jordans, two Yankees ball caps, and a 60” HDTV.

On the fifth day of looting my homies stole for me five gold teeth…..four packs of rolling paper, three pair of Jordans, two Yankees ball caps, and a 60” HDTV.

On the sixth day of looting my homies stole for me six Swisher Sweets, five gold teeth, four packs of rolling papers, three pair of Jordans, two Yankees ball caps, and a 60” HDTV.

On the seventh day of looting my homies stole for me seven Scarface t-shirts, six Swisher Sweets, five gold teeth, four packs of rolling papers, three pair of Jordans, two Yankees ball caps, and a 60” HDTV.

On the eighth day of looting my homies stole for me eight Four Lokos, seven Scarface t-shirts, six Swisher Sweets, five gold teeth, four packs of rolling papers, three pair of Jordans, two Yankees ball caps, and a 60” HDTV.

On the ninth day of looting my homies stole for me nine hair weaves, eight Four Lokos, seven Scarface t-shirts, six Swisher Sweets, five gold teeth, four packs of rolling papers, three pair of Jordans, two Yankees ball caps, and a 60” HDTV.

On the tenth day of looting my homies stole for me ten scratch tickets, nine hair weaves, eight Four Lokos, seven Scarface t-shirts, six Swisher Sweets, five gold teeth, four packs of rolling papers, three pair of Jordans, two Yankees ball caps, and a 60” HDTV.

On the eleventh day of looting my homies stole for me eleven gold chains, ten scratch tickets, nine hair weaves, eight Four Lokos, seven Scarface t-shirts, six Swisher Sweets, five gold teeth, four packs of rolling papers, three pair of Jordans, two Yankees ball caps, and a 60” HDTV.

On the twelfth day of looting my homies stole for me twelve Steel Reserves, eleven gold chains, ten scratch tickets, nine hair weaves, eight Four Lokos, seven Scarface t-shirts, six Swisher Sweets, five gold teeth, four packs of rolling papers, three pair of Jordans, two Yankees ball caps, and a 60” HDTV.

Ah, yes. The holiday season is upon us, and the Ferguson Grand Jury verdict came in just as the businesses destroyed by the August riots and lootings had just gotten back on their feet and as fate would have it, when stores were loaded up with product for Black Friday and the holiday weekend. Plenty of goodies to steal, because nothing honors the memory of a dead guy like stealing everything in sight and burning down your neighborhood.

Yeah, nothing says you care about your community like destroying what other people have. Now here we are in the midst of freezing weather and the pending holidays, and you savages have put dozens and dozens of people out of work by destroying their businesses.

What did that poor woman have to do with the death of Mike Brown? You just destroyed her livelihood, built by her hard work and with money she saved for years.

Every police car destroyed has to be replaced at the cost of taxpayer money, but you animals don't pay taxes, so what does it matter to you?

Not content with burning police cars, you then proceeded to torch a car dealership. Some of you vile cretins carjacked an old man, ran him over with his own car, and beat him with his oxygen tank. What the hell is wrong with you animals? Oh, that's right; it was just an old white dude so that's not racist, or even newsworthy.

And snitches get stitches, right? That's why 20-year old DeAndre Joshua was shot in the head as he sat in his car the other night as the riots started. He was rumored to have been a witness who testified at the Grand Jury hearings that exonerated Darren Wilson.

This violence was planned. It was per-meditated. Leaders of the local New Black Panthers were arrested days ago in possession of weapons while trying to buy materials to make pipe bombs.

Mike Brown's stepfather was filmed on live TV screaming for people to "Burn this bitch down!". Ironically his church was burned down by rioters. Days ago, a guy who was leading a "Fuck Tha Police" rally in Ferguson had his car stolen. Karma. Schadenfreude. Animals eventually turn on each other.

I take no joy in the fact that these people lost their son. I take no joy in the fact that another young man fell astray of the law and died as the result of his actions, but when you're high and rob a convenience store and then confront and beat a cop, it's hard to be overly sympathetic. Look, people, the Grand Jury, made up of volunteers from the community,and comprised of exactly the same racial makeup ratio as the community, listened to over 70 hours of evidence and testimony from over 60 witnesses and numerous forensic reports and exonerated Officer Wilson. But exonerated sure as hell doesn't mean he gets his life back. He will never work as a cop in Ferguson again. He'll likely have to move and leave the state in order to find some semblance of normalcy in a new location away from people threatening to kill him. As is, the New York Times is actively assisting those trying to kill him by publishing his home address so that vigilantes may more easily find him.

So out of a sense of fairness, here are the addresses of the Times reporters who are trying to get Wilson killed, courtesy of John Hawkins at Right Wing News and Charles Johnson from GotNews.

Bosman’s address 
CHICAGO, IL 60660-4204

Robertson's address
NEW ORLEANS, LA 70119-3203

And where is Al Sharpton? Where is Jesse Jackson? Shouldn't they be there in Ferguson to stop the violence? Aw, hell nawwwwww....they're off looking for the next photo-op. And where is outgoing Attorney General Eric Holder? He visited in August to make sure the race-baiting flames were being fanned to take attention away from his boss, so why not make one final appearance to threaten Wislon with Federal charges now that the state case is closed? It would take attention away from Lord Obeezy circumventing the Constitution with Executive Orders on immigration. But that's a blog for another day.

And if you missed my coverage of the earlier riots, go here.

To catch my coverage of the farcical funeral, go here.

Thursday, November 6, 2014

Giving the Left a swift kick in the crotch: Election 2014

Ahhh, the midterm elections of 2014. Americans FINALLY woke up and realized the mistake they made in 2012 because they were too stupid to figure out the mistake they made in 2008 that we tried to correct in 2010.

Needless to say, the Republicans trounced the Democrats. The GOP took over control of the Senate, and made a bigger majority in the House. The Left lost several key state gubernatorial races and state legislatures. In all, the Red Tide done swamped the donkey party.

Here in South Carolina, we're so racist that we elected the only black Senator, something the Democrats seem unable to do. And because the Republican War On Women is such a big deal, here in South Carolina we re-elected our Governor, a woman whose parents came here from India.

My Governor is not to be trifled with.

Speaking of the War on Women, I think we can finally stop beating that dead horse. The carcass has no more meat on the flayed bones.

Joni Ernst won a Senate seat from Iowa. She's a combat vet and her husband is a former Command Sergeant Major with the Army Rangers. She is the first woman ever elected to Congress from Iowa.

Mia Love of Utah became the first black Republican woman elected to Congress. Her parents are immigrants from Haiti.

Elise Stefanik became the youngest person ever elected to Congress at just 30 years of age. She represents the 21st District of New York. Yes, deeply blue New York. Renee Ellmers defeated Clay Aiken (yeah, that Clay Aiken) in North Carolina. Being a celebrity is no longer enough of a qualification to be in Congress.

In Arizona, the results are still too close to call, but Martha McSally, who was the Air Force's first female combat pilot, could win her district.

In West Virginia, Shelley Moore Capito became the first Republican Senator elected out of that state in nearly 55 years, also becoming the state's first female Senator. And also in West Virginia, an 18 year old college freshman and fiscal conservative, Saira Blair, was elected to the West Virginia Legislature and thus became the nation's youngest lawmaker. She trounced her Democrat opponent 63% to 30% after defeating the 66-year old Republican incumbent in the primary when she was just 17. Kickin' ass and takin' names.
Of course, the Left will still claim there's a war on women since many of their women were defeated. Wendy Davis went down in flames in Texas after a dirty, ugly, sickening gubernatorial campaign. It's likely that Mary Landrieu will also go down in flames in Louisiana's Senate race. Kay Hagan was tossed out of the Senate in North Carolina. Sandra Fluke was beaten like a drum, losing her bid for a seat in the California state Senate by 22 points, to a FELLOW| DEMOCRAT.  Loser.....

Maryland, which has been deeply blue since I lived there as a kid for my first 14 years, elected a Republican Governor. Liberal Massachusetts elected a Republican Governor, as did Illinois. Yes, you read that right. Illinois. Seriously.

Arkansas, which gave us the Clintons, kicked out both Democrat Senators and the Democrat Governor and replaced them with Republicans. In Florida, Rick Scott was able to hold off a challenge from turncoat sleazebag Charlie"the Chameleon" Crist, who changes parties as the wind blows.

And the liberal leftist lapdog media? They lost their minds. PRICELESS... what? Lord Obeezy suffered an embarrassing Tuesday but still has two years left to continue destroying the nation.

Don't screw this up, GOP. Remember, WW2 went on another year after D-Day so the war ain't over just because we steamrolled the Donkey Brigade in the mid-terms.

Friday, October 10, 2014

Come out, come out, wherever you are...

As is my wont, every year I celebrate my gay friends (or as I prefer to call them, friends) on National Coming Out Day. You are who you are, and I wouldn't have you any other way. For some of you, coming out was easy and painless. For some of you it was painful and difficult. Some of you did it early on and some waited years. Some of you may still be waiting. Today is as good as any, you know...

This past week, the Supreme Court of the United States basically gave a tacit nod to same-sex marriage by deciding not to hear five cases concerning same-sex marriage, pretty much legalizing it in 30 states. Here in South Carolina, Probate Judges in several jurisdictions began taking applications from same-sex couples, but our state Attorney General blocked the licenses from being issued. Seemingly there was nothing better to spend taxpayer money on than pursuing legal action to keep people from marrying. I'm sorely disappointed in the AG, and I voted for the man.

Recently, a friend got married to the love of his life. They did it on a trip to New York City, not because of the romantic setting but because their home state of Florida doesn't recognize or allow for same-sex marriage. They could have opted for what is called a Holy Union but even though it won't be legally recognized at home they wanted something more, and why shouldn't they?

Here in South Carolina, voters amended the state constitution to specifically state that marriage is between a man and a woman. I voted against that. Despite my generally conservative and right-wing leanings, I fully support same sex marriage. Many of my friends are gay and are married. They have perfectly normal and wonderful, loving marriages. Many of them have been married a lot longer than I have.

Look, this isn't the first time I spoken out in favor of same sex marriage. If you're against gay marriage, don't have one. In no way, shape, or form is my marriage put in jeopardy by a gay couple tying the knot. The sanctity of marriage isn't ruined by same-sex marriage. That sanctity is instead ruined by people who take marriage way too lightly. However, we celebrate when the rich and famous hetero community ties the knot, despite the fact that celebs like, say, the Kardashians or Pam Anderson, or even iconic figures like Liz Taylor or Marylin Monroe, have 30-day marriages or collect spouses like some people collect stamps, but that's okay because they're hetero. Presidents like JFK or Clinton are no better, bordering on serial adultery while in office and making a mockery of both their marriages and the solemnity of the Presidency, but hey, they're straight so it's okay. But we deny the simple right of a marriage to same-sex couples.

The Kardashian Marriage Farce Fest:

Kris Jenner--Divorced first husband Robert Kardashian after 13 years, married Bruce Jenner a month later. Currently divorcing him after 23 years.

Kim Kardashian--Famous for making a sex tape. Has no other discernable talents. Married in 2000, filed for divorce in 2003. Married again in 2011, filed for divorce 72 days later. While awaiting divorce, gets knocked up by Kanye West. Currently married to West after a wedding that would have bankrupted most third world economies.

Kourtney Kardashian--On again, off again relationship with father of her 3 kids. They've not married.

Khloe Kardashian--Married in 2009 a month after meeting, filed for divorce in 2013.

Many who are against same-sex marriage say marriage is one man and one woman married in a church under the eyes of God. This has me wondering....if you folks reading this agree with that definition, then am I actually married in your eyes?

Some of you would frown upon the fact I am divorced, as is my wife. For this second marriage of mine, I was not married in a church, either. Rather, we got hitched in front of the plantation mansion at Boone Hall during the annual Scottish Games in full kilted regalia. I was not even married by a clergy member. My friend Jackie, a notary public, officiated. Our self-penned vows were not the traditional religious-themed vows found in most ceremonies. As part of the ceremony we did a Celtic hand-fasting (gasp! a pagan rite!) and we jumped a broom afterwards (gasp! More heathen rituals!)

So, by everyone's strict definition of marriage, I must not be married, despite that scrap of paper I had to quickly sign afterwards to make it legal? After all, it's that precious scrap of paper that everyone seems to need as proof of being married. So, seemingly, marriage is but a legal contract that binds us together as opposed to some religious ceremonial bugaboo.

But Steve, them awful homosexicals are an abomination against the sanctity of marriage betwixt man and woman and they make baby Jesus cry.....

Look, the Christian Bible is chock-a-block FULL of spurious forms of traditional Biblical marriages.

But Steve, if we alter the definition of marriage, who's to say people won't try to define marriage as a man and two women, or a man and a chair, or a man and a dog or a car, or that you can marry little kids? 

 It's already been done, people. In 2009 a Tokyo man married a video game character and a woman married a roller coaster. In 2007 a woman married the Eiffel Tower. Men have married life-sized dolls. A woman married a dolphin in 2005. In Islam, Mohammed was 51 and married a 6 year old. Muslims marry kids all the time.

How about we define legal marriage as being between two (2) consenting adults of legal age of majority regardless of gender, race, or religion? Works for me.

And before you Liberals out there pounce on the Right and start laying the blame our way, it was serial adulterer William Jefferson Clinton, President Slick Willie himself, who signed the Defense of Marriage Act into law.

That alone should nullify it.

It's 2014, not 1014. Come out of the Dark Ages.

Monday, September 8, 2014

Y'know, I kinda told you so...

No one likes to hear a snarky snide "I told you so" from anyone, be it your spouse, your parent, your sibling, your child, your co-worker, or some smartass blogger. However......I kinda did tell y'all so.

Back in March when Malaysian Airlines Flight 370 went AWOL, I immediately hypothesized that the plane was stolen for later use by terrorists. Missed it? Read all about it. I then gave you my hypothetical list of targets based upon my humble professional estimation.

Now we get word recently that when Islamist scumbag ne'er do wells took over the Tripoli Airport as Libya circles the drain into an ISIS-like abyss, in addition to destroying a large number of planes on the ground, eleven or twelve jetliners from two Libya are missing. Yeah, missing. As in, nobody knows where the Farouk they are. We're talking about some of the most widely-used and ubiquitous airliners worldwide, the type that BLEND IN and don't get noticed until they HIT THINGS AND EXPLODE.

A lot of planes on the ground were destroyed because Islam can't have nice things.

Doing the Happy Dance on top of a captured Libyan Airlines jet. They look stable and peaceful...

The state-owned Libyan Airlines fleet included up 20 jets, including eight Airbus 320s, two Airbus 330s and eight Bombardier CJR-900s. Also state-owned, the Afriqiyah Airways fleet includes three Airbus 319s, seven Airbus 320s, two Airbus 330s, and one Airbus 340. The 319/320's and CJR-900's are relatively shorter-range jets but the 330's and the 4-engine 340 are definitely larger long-haul planes capable of trans-Atlantic flights. That's bothersome, since Thursday is the anniversary of 9/11.

Seriously. Think about it. Don't roll your eyes and call me a Tinfoil Hat whack-job. ISIS likes to behead people on TV. You don't think they'd like to do something major to us this week?

And you may also recall that in July I warned everyone that this stream of underage Third-World disease vectors flooding across our borders like a plague of locusts with the express permission of the White House could be very bad ju-ju. And today we get word that, SURPRISE!!!!!, hundreds of children across America have been sickened in recent weeks by what health officials suspect is a rare respiratory virus.

The CDC believes that Human Enterovirus 68, part of the virus family that includes polio and the common cold rhinovirus, is at the root of the epidemic, though testing of samples has not produced a definitive answer. Normally a bowel affliction, the virus is now affecting the respiratory system.

The Denver Post reported that officials at Children's Hospital Colorado have treated more than 900 children for severe respiratory illnesses since August 18, with 86 admitted to the hospital.At Rocky Mountain Hospital for Children, doctors put five children on ventilators this week, including a 13-year-old boy whose condition deteriorated from a mild cold to a life-threatening illness overnight.

In Kansas City, one hospital said 15 percent of the affected pediatric patients have been hospitalized.

The CDC said that similar suspected outbreaks have been reported in Colorado, Missouri, Kansas, Illinois, Kentucky, Iowa, Ohio, Oklahoma, North Carolina, and Georgia. The Columbus (Ohio) Dispatch reported that Nationwide Children's Hospital reported seeing an average of 73 patients with respiratory complaints per day between August 31 and September 2.

What a coincidence that this rare virus has an outbreak just before 9/11, after tens of thousands of illegals pour into our population centers, and just as school starts back up.

 Call me a Conspiracy Theorist Headcase if you want, but coincidences aren't always mere simple coincidences. Often times there are more nefarious machinations afoot. Don't get caught unprepared.