Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Coastal African Maritime Entrepeneurs (with Guest Blogger Jim)

All we need is Alice in the middle and it's the new Brady Bunch...

For the past month, there has been much kerfuffle and ballyhoo surrounding the increase in attacks by Somali pirates. Folks act like this is some new sort of problem, as if the scrawny little bastards haven’t been marauding about on the seas off Africa for half of all recorded history. There are also active pirates around Thailand, too, in case you live under a rock.

My dear old Army buddy, Guest Blogger Jim, weighed in a couple of weeks ago on the subject:

April 11
The Marine Corps Hymn goes “From the halls of Montezuma, to the shores of Tripoli; we will fight our country's battles in the air, on land and sea"......that's unless you are the so-called Lincoln of our Times™. If you're that guy, you're reportedly worried about getting a special pizza chef in to throw you together a couple of pies for Easter or you’d rather discuss housing. This, while part of your Navy steams into hostile waters to deal with an on-going pirate/hostage issue.

A bit of a history lesson: the newly-formed USA fought 2 wars with the Barbary pirates, first from 1801-05, and again in 1813. This was after paying tribute to the Muslim pirates for years (hence the 1st war), and upon becoming engaged in a second war with Great Britain (The War of 1812). It seems the pirates were able to do a bit of critical thinking and surmised that the newly-formed nation could not protect its shipping interest in the Med and started highjacking our vessels. This resulted in a negotiated settlement with the pirates, until such a time as the new country had built up a sufficient naval force to deal with them, which we did beginning in 1801. Upon completion of this conflict in 1805, the United States thought it had won the peace and secured a treaty with said pirates. This lasted until 1807 when the pirates got back into business. It was out of this first conflict that much of the history and lore of the U.S.M.C. was born, by the acts of Presley O’Bannon, Stephen Decatur, and the men they led. Enter the “leathernecks” and the Mameluke sword.

From 1807 until 1815, whilst gearing up for and fighting a second war with England, the Barbary pirates began to seize American ships and citizens in the Med and demand tribute---again. After a successful completion of the War of 1812, we headed back to North Africa to remind the asshole Muslim pirates who we were. In about a month’s time we kicked their collective ass and got our people back. A year later the Brits had to do it again however, but it seemed like the last time.....until this week.

On Wednesday April 8, 2009, Richard Phillips became the first US hostage taken by pirates in almost 200 years. This does not include the Mayaguez incident of 1975, as it involved the Khmer Rouge, and is considered the final battle of the Vietnam War.

In response to the incident, when asked by reporters, the Lincoln of our Times™ said," Guys, we are talking about housing here." Kinda demonstrates his inability to think on his feet, no? So the Lincoln of our Times™ lets the issue fall to Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, who says that the pirates are criminals. Hate to tell ya’, lady, but interfering with a country’s commerce on the high seas is an act of war. They knew it in the 1800’s and it’s still that way today. Surprise!

Granted, Somalia is on the Indian Ocean and not in the Med, but it is the same practitioners of the Religion of Peace who are doing this shit 200 years later. As far as I know, the Somalis are not selling Christians into slavery like the Barbary pirates did, but they are still boarding our vessels and holding American citizens hostage. In response, we are sending an FBI negotiator to the scene to help the navy.

WTF???? Since when do Navy SEALs need the FBI's help with shit? Stop fucking about, and kill these assholes and their fuck-buddies on shore and anybody else that sells 'em tooth paste or tennis shoes and be done with it.

You are only a super power as long as you use your force to protect your interests abroad. People try this shit against us because we treat everything like it’s a simple shoplifting case. Talking to four dickheads in a rowboat from the deck of a multi-million dollar destroyer only makes you look weak, Oh Mister Lincoln II. The Barbary pirates could spot weakness all those long years ago, and people today are no less sophisticated. Hope you enjoyed the pizza.

April 12 (The Day After The SEALs Rescued Captain Phillips)
So the news today makes me look like a raving fucking genius. Good job, squids; my hat is off to you for your proficiency with the long gun with a 3 1/2 outta 4. Live bodies only count as half cause they want to give him a trial and a free lawyer, access to our courts, etc. This guy thinks he's a buccaneer, so make his ass walk the plank. It is part of their code, right?

We should be following up on all actionable intel and hitting their bases ashore as well as their mother ships. You can run but you can't hide. Keep reading, Lincoln II; I have many more good ideas and I’ll even cut you a reduced rate on a package deal.

Yeah...we negotiate with underfed khat-fiends brandishing rusty-assed RPK's left over from some bush war in Angola in the 70's

Additional input from MojoSteve:

Well, well…His Presidentialness actually gave the green light to his very first use of force by Special Ops troops. Great job by the SEALs, and great job by the entire crew of the Bainbridge. Of course, there were what, three other ships alongside by that time, too, including a giant amphibious assault ship? Billions of dollars in sophisticated assets for four khat-stoned Skinnies in a lifeboat…and lest we forget the skilled FBI hostage negotiators, since of course we negotiate with terrorists and pirates and every other swinging Dick that decides to mess with us worldwide. It ended the EXACT way it should have, with pirates zipped up in bags and our guy safe. That, sir, is how you negotiate with scumbags.

According to witnesses, the sole survivor of the four pirates, 18-year old Abdiwali Abdiqadir Muse was not shy about making his presence known on the Maersk Alabama, brazenly tearing through the ship in a way that belied his young age and skinny, 5-foot-2 frame. He was the first to board the ship, fired a shot at the captain on the bridge, helped steal $30,000 in cash from a safe, and bragged about hijacking ships in the past, authorities said. He said that his dream was to come to America; he got his wish, and even if we send his bony little ass to prison he’ll still get three hots and a cot and be living moderately better than he was before he became a pirate. And even if he gets raped in the prison showers, he’ll still have less of a chance of contracting HIV than he would have back home.

Of course, this all finally hit the news because it was a US-flag vessel involved. The Skinnies have been high jacking and pirating ships for years, and while they just recently really stepped it up to capturing mega-vessels for ransoms, they’d never screwed with a US-flagged ship before. They just happened to hit the wrong ship at the wrong time. I guess they just saw Maersk and didn’t know any better. That’s mostly because there are damned few US-flagged ships making cargo runs anymore; it’s too expensive to register your vessels here. The cheap way is to register it and flag it out of Panama. Evergreen Line (the conglomeration of what used to be four branches of the same tree: Evergreen Marine Corp. (Taiwan) Ltd., Italia Marittima S.p.A., Evergreen Marine (UK) Ltd. and Evergreen Marine (Hong Kong) Ltd.) rolls past my workplace all the time in these huge 965-foot bright green container ships with PANAMA on the ass end.

The ship that was taken was the Maersk Alabama, one of a fleet operated by Maersk Line Limited, a US-based subsidiary of the Danish company Maersk Line. MLL handles the US-flag operations for Maersk. With the largest U.S. flag fleet in international trades, MLL supports military and humanitarian missions through the transport of cargo on its container, tanker, dry-bulk, multi-purpose and roll-on/roll-off ships. That means that when you run into a Maersk ship under a US flag, it’s full of governmental goodies. I recently saw a certain un-named sister ship of the Alabama come through a certain un-named East Coast port facility with certain unspecified governmental cargo that was under heavy guard by certain un-named floating assets of the government.

Now, maybe some of the shipping companies in the world are okay with paying ransoms and encouraging these Skinnies to keep on taking their ships, when instead they should be arming their crews, or hiring out some security. I know there’s an assload of currently underemployed and bore Blackwater guys who need some gainful employ after being kicked out of Iraq. Perhaps instead of selling off all our older Perry-class frigates to foreign navies we should transfer them to the US Coast Guard and let them escort US-flag cargo ships in and out of certain Third World shit holes where pirates lurk, especially since the USCG is in sore need of some deep-water assets to replace some seriously aging cutters. It’s hard to guard the coast with 40-year old cutters in need of drydock and stuff that shouldn’t operate more than 20 miles offshore.

Look, the Coasties get the shitty end of the stick and we all know it. Move them back under Department of the Navy where they belong, instead of under Transportation until wartime. They have ships and guns and uniforms and ranks; they’re military. Give them some decent gear though. The two cutters assigned to Charleston are the biggest ships the USCG has, but they’re also a year older than me and need replacements. The Perry-class frigates that we keep selling off to Poland and Pakistan and Egypt and Turkey and Bahrain could be transferred to the Coast Guard instead. The Navy already removed the missile launcher and magazine from the remaining ships anyways, leaving them no better armed than the current cutters the Coast Guard possesses, but they’re on average 20-25 years newer than the Hamilton-class cutters and more capable for deep water operations than the Bear-class.

But I digress.

Until someone; i.e.: the spineless gutless UN (Useless Nations) puts together a multinational force to float the fuck over there and take out the pirate bases and mother ships, they’ll just keep coming back. And compared to sitting around in your own filth in a country with no government or economy, chewing khat weed and waiting to die in between calls to prayers, a life of piracy is a pretty good-looking alternative unless we make it less lucrative and fulfilling. And while retrofitting your 800-million-dollar cargo ship with a rather inexpensive 1-million dollar set of four Minigun stations is a no-brainer, brains are in remarkably short supply in shipping, it seems.

So far, the best idea that I’ve heard has come from Congressman Ron Paul (R-TX), and in a sense wouldn’t really be that far off from what I mentioned before about guys from Blackwater and other contract guns for hire. Representative Paul reminded us all that one of the powers of Congress, little used, is to issue Letters of Marque and Reprisal. A letter of marque is an official warrant or commission from a government authorizing the designated agent to search, seize, or destroy specified assets or personnel belonging to a foreign party which has committed some offense under the laws of nations against the assets or citizens of the issuing nation, and as such would be pretty handy for dealing with pirates.

The formal statement of the warrant is to authorize the agent to pass beyond the borders of the nation ("marque" or frontier), and there to search, seize, or destroy an enemy's vessel or fleet. It is considered a retaliatory measure short of a full declaration of war, and, by maintaining a rough proportionality, has been intended to justify the action to other nations. As with a domestic search, seizure, arrest, or death warrant, to be considered lawful it needs to have a certain degree of specificity to ensure that the agent does not exceed his authority and the intent of the issuing authority. In the past, a ship operating under a letter of marque and reprisal was privately owned and was called a "private man-of-war" or "privateer." The French sometimes used the term lettre de course for its letters of marque, giving rise to the term corsair.

So we can just issue a letter of marque against the pirates and turn out the high-dollar mercenaries (um, I mean government contractors) to ventilate their skulls and ribcages with many large-caliber holes. Then again, getting the current shitbirds in Congress to actually do it is another matter. With that scumbag Arlen Specter jumping ship to the Democrats today, that gives them 59 Senate seats, and if that idiot assbag flake Al Franken gets in that’ll make a solid 60 seats and a fillibuster-proof majority, made all the worse by having Maine’s two RINO’s at their beck and call.

So instead of any reprisals, this Congress will likely instead offer free tuitions and healthcare to any and all pirates who want to slide on over here. Nancy Pelosi will call them true patriots, and that simpleton Napolitano will coin a new phrase; instead of “pirates” they’ll be called “Coastal African Maritime Entrepeneurs”. Wonder how they’ll like having their wealth redistributed?

Monday, April 27, 2009

How I spent Earth Day

I was a bit too busy last week to blog about Earth Day.

I did however spend Earth Day trying to type up something in my living room, where my laptop is set up over in the corner, trying like hell to see in the dim light provided by some shitty Compact Fluorescent Light Bulb, lovingly provided free of charge in the mail by some organization or other.

It gives off perhaps half the brightness of the bulb it replaced, causing us to often leave on a second overhead light fixture across the room with a regular bulb, using more electricity by running two bulbs than I was using by running one regular incandescent bulb.

Perhaps the green movement would be happier if we all just turned off all the lights and roamed the house wearing night-vision goggles.

Green Movement, my ass. It’s another trendy bullshit marketing ploy. It started off as a great idea, and I wholeheartedly support a healthy environment and preserving Nature, but Global Warming is a farce and now the whole Green thing has just become a giant moneymaking scheme.

With the economy all jacked up, corporations are looking for any and every way to get what little money you have and put it in their coffers. Right now, the best and trendiest way is to call something Green. Green homes, Green living, Green this and Green that…..cleaners, laundry detergent, dishwashing soap, diapers, baby wipes, tampons, recycled toilet paper, tissues, and paper towels…if they can slap a Green label on it, they’ll sell it.

Sadly, they did the same thing with the pink ribbons for breast cancer awareness. After awhile, it ceased being a tool for increasing awareness and just became a schtick for selling anything and everything. I shit you not; I saw the pink ribbon on Jello boxes and on cheap plastic measuring cups. What exactly does Jello have to do with breast cancer awareness? As the child of a breast cancer survivor I found the use of the ribbon as a cheap fashion statement and advertising tool to sell trinkets, baubles, and bullshit measuring cups to be a tad nauseating.

Didn’t someone show in a study that it did more damage to the environment to make a hybrid like the Prius? Or that it cost more to own & operate a Prius than it did a Hummer? I hope I don’t get cancer from all the mercury in the compact bulbs or the toxins in the batteries on all the hybrids driving to and fro….what the hell color ribbon do I get for being killed by the Green Movement?

Instead of 8 feet to the gallon, the hybrid gets 12 feet...

Y’know what? The guy who was one of the founders of Earth Day was Ira Einhorn, who killed his girlfriend and stuffed her in a suitcase and then eventually fled the country. You should Google his name because I don’t have the patience right now to shoot you the backstory. The day he was arrested was the day of the incident at Three Mile Island. The environmentalist killed more people than the alleged environmental disaster.

Irony and schadenfreude…I love ‘em both.

What's more dangerous? Four pressurized-water reactors, or one liberal reactonary?

Sunday, April 26, 2009

The Gates of Hell Opened Up for the JROTC Debate

Fair Warning...this is one long-assed post!

Ever wonder where the Gates of Hell are? Some of you may think they’re behind the Customer Service desk at every Wal-Mart, but those just lead to Hell’s attic. At various points in time, the true Gates have been in a bunker in Berlin, in a field in Cambodia, and in the Darfur region of Sudan.

Being of the occult and supernatural nature, the Gates of Hell have located themselves in various spots around the globe during different epochs in history. They open wherever and whenever great wrongs are being committed against all sanity. Once again, I claim that the Gates of Hell are currently located under the sign at Haight and Ashbury in San Francisco. Nowhere in the current world is there a greater spawning ground of sheer and utter lunacy.

The City by the Bay sends its tentacles out to Sacramento, where they’ve turned the Republican Governor into a quasi-liberal spineless RINO, and are even trying to make it so that Big Liberal Government can dictate what color your car can be. The tentacles surround and embrace Lost Angeles, where the Hollyweird elite and effete liberals breed like flies on fresh turds. They reach to the far woods of NorCal, where if you listen hard enough, you can hear the granola crunching and the trees groaning under the weight of being hugged to death by enviro-nazis serving up Global Warming-flavored Kool Aid. They reach to the far southern border to Meh-hee-ko, where the SoCal liberals welcome illegals with open arms and have made the border so porous that if you launch a flare at 2AM it’s the equivalent of flipping on a light in a dirty hovel and seeing the roaches scramble.

And then there’s San Fran’s very own Orthus, the two-headed Hellhound related to Cerberus. One head is Dianne Feinstein and the other is Nancy Pelosi, both eager to destroy all that America used to stand for. They won’t stop until they crucify everyone who was in the Bush administration in one giant Stalinist purge.

Not everyone in California is insane, despite evidence to the contrary. Notable exceptions to the lunacy include the former and current Congressional Representatives from the 52d District; Duncan Duane Hunter, who succeeded his father, the estimable Duncan Lee Hunter, continues the good fight.

And remember, I’m not a Republican so as much as you may think that I’ve lost my mind, I must give some solid props to a Democrat, namely 12th District Representative to the State Assembly Fiona Ma.


Lay on, MacDuff…

You see, it seems that in that 9th Circle of Hell called San Francisco, a movement is afoot to remove the JROTC programs from high schools. That icky military…phooey!

Pentagon officials, calling JROTC "an important academic and citizenship program for high school students," say they're hopeful the program will be saved. But they also say there are 700 schools in the country that are waiting to adopt the program if San Francisco drops it.

Opponents of JROTC programs, meanwhile, say educating students should remain a role for civilians, and not for retired members of the armed forces. Um… hey, assholes, guess what? They are civilians. They just happen to be military retirees who still give back to the community and the nation by educating kids who have a desire to learn something beyond the three R’s that our failing schools teach. You flakes are just getting all bent out of shape because those civilians don their service uniforms when they teach class. Would you piss, moan, and bitch about, say, an algebra teacher or biology teacher who wore khakis and a tie but was also a military retiree? I guess you’d rather weed out anyone with military experience from teaching, I suppose.

The fight began two years ago, when San Francisco's school board voted to phase out JROTC programs by the end of the 2007-08 school year, citing recruitment concerns and the military's policy toward gays. Admittedly, the military has never exactly been very liberal, nor even progressive socially. However, life sucks and comes with no guarantees. Besides, Obama wants to drop the current “don’t ask/don’t tell” and let gays openly serve, so the Bay City should stop whining and let the JROTC be.

The program was extended for another year, but last June, under threats of a lawsuit for not enforcing tougher state education standards, the school board voted to stop granting gym credits to JROTC students and to offer JROTC as an elective course only. Immediately, enrollment in JROTC dropped dramatically. (I always thought JROTC was an elective. Did I miss something? And since when did you get gym credit for it? Then again, some drill & ceremony, marching, and perhaps the occasional obstacle course is better than some of the bullshit I had in gym class, like square dancing.)

State assemblywoman Fiona Ma, a Democrat from San Francisco, recently submitted legislation that would reinstate JROTC at seven of the city's public schools and overturn the original decision by its Unified School District to phase out the program.

State Assemblywoman Fiona Ma

"Hat's off to Fiona Ma to try and save this program," said Jay Agg, a spokesman for AMVETS, a group of 180,000 U.S. veterans. "We hope she's successful — it'd be a real shame to deprive students in San Francisco or any other city the opportunity to reap the benefits of the program."

Among those benefits, Agg said, are the instruction of several key "life skills," including positive values and morals, strong leadership and community service.

"You're taking advantage of an opportunity to teach morals and honor and discipline and love of country," Agg said. "You want them to learn at a young age to be a good leader."

Aye, there’s the rub. The Libs don’t want kids to learn anything positive from anything related to the military establishment. They want you learning Socialism and Bailouts.

Ma's bill — which passed out of an education committee last week by a 6-3 vote — now heads to the state's Appropriations Committee. Assembly Bill 223 would then require a two-thirds vote in the Legislature to take effect immediately. Pentagon officials continue to monitor its progress.

State Bill 601, enacted last January, fortified physical education standards in California and requires the state’s Department of Education to monitor to what extent schools provide physical education instruction by gym teachers who hold appropriate credentials.

Last June, facing allegations that it was illegally granting physical education credits for JROTC classes, the San Francisco school board members voted to eliminate the gym credit.

Frankly, I’m amazed that they haven’t just eliminated gym, since it might promote competition. Isn’t it the Liberal Way to just give everyone a trophy so there’s no winner/loser and no one’s feelings get hurt. Hell, no one gets hurt at all if there’s no gym class, but I guess when the Governor is a former bodybuilder you sorta have to play nice with having gym classes until they vote him out of office.

"Since none of our JROTC instructors hold appropriate physical education credentials, that's one factor the board took into consideration," said spokeswoman Gentle Blythe, who also noted that State Superintendent of Public Instruction Jack O'Connell wrote a letter last April to Colonel Michael Johnson, who oversees California's JROTC programs, stating that JROTC classes do not, in most cases, fulfill the state's requirements for physical education.

Enrollment in the city's seven JROTC programs, which had already dropped from 1,600 students in 2006-07 to 1,050 in 2007-08, sank to about 500 this year once the phys-ed credit was removed. Just prior to and during the early part of that time, I hasten to point out, there was much ballyhoo and sniveling at San Francisco State University by weasel-dicks trying to keep military recruiters and ROTC off campus, which I’m sure didn’t help interest in the JROTC programs.

Ma claims the decrease in enrollment has coincided with the school board's decision to eliminate the gym credit. The Department of Education was unable to provide statistics on the number of schools that offer physical education credits for JROTC programs, but at least two states, Florida and Alabama, specifically list ROTC programs as an option for fulfilling the requirement.

In other cities like Chicago, which has at least 34 JROTC programs at city high schools, students receive physical education credit for participation, said Frank Shuftan, a spokesman for Chicago Public Schools. In New York, students do not, according to Department of Education spokeswoman Margie Feinberg. I’m rather surprised that there’s JROTC in Chicago, which is currently Hell’s anteroom; while the Gates themselves are not there, I do believe there’s an open window, or at least a doggie-door.

If you recall, the University of Chicago still proudly bans ROTC from its campus, along with Harvard, Yale, Columbia, Tufts and Stanford, a pathetic remnant of their protests of the Vietnam War.

Established by Congress in 1916, JROTC was an Army program before it was expanded to all branches of the armed forces in 1964. The program is now the Defense Department's largest youth development program, with more than 480,000 students enrolled nationwide in about 3,400 secondary schools. In 2007-08 alone, Lainez said, those students performed more than 7 million hours of community service.

Agg said the programs also provide invaluable health benefits to students.
"At a time when obesity and physical fitness are such important issues in America, this is not the time to be cutting back on physical education," he said. "It's a critical area and an important education piece, and JROTC does have a physical fitness element to it."

Vicky Chung, a senior at San Francisco's Lowell High School, told members of the Assembly during an April 1 hearing that the city's school board was not "thinking critically" when it voted to end JROTC programs that she said have taught her the importance of a higher education.

"Please, please, please use your power to intervene on our behalf," Chung said, according to prepared remarks. "I feel as [if] I'm back in the '50s and '60s, fighting for my civil liberties when the suppressors continue to force policies on me, limiting my freedoms, my rights, my choices."

Well said, young lady. The Left wants to control your choices and limit your freedoms, and you wisely see right through them at your young age of 17 or 18. I salute you.

By the way, Miss Chung is slated to go into a pre-med program at UC Davis after graduation instead of into the military.

Ma said school board members should "uphold the will of the voters," and cited Proposition V, a resolution that urged the school board to retain JROTC programs. It passed with 55 percent of the vote in November.

"We should be doing as much as we can to get children to stay in school and promote leadership development and community service," Ma told FOXNews.com. "This is about the students' right to choose and about programs that work."

But critics of Ma's proposal, including Assemblyman Tom Ammiano, D-San Francisco, and members of Veterans for Peace say there's no place for military programs on high school campuses.

"Regardless of how you feel about JROTC, it is unprecedented for the state to mandate that an individual district offer an elective, non-critical program for a small number of students," he said. This is about respecting the rights of local elected school boards to make their own decisions." Since when have the Libs ever worried about local rights when they’re all about a big, babysitting, central socialized system?

Hal Muskat, an Army veteran who refused to serve in Vietnam, said he doesn't want his tax dollars going to what he calls "military training" for high school students.

"This is military training, it's that simple," said Muskat, now a member of Veterans for Peace. "This is about softening up very impressionable, open-minded, young teenagers to the cult of militarism. Military skills have no place in public schools."

What utter bullshit. Sounds just like the same sort of hippy crap my own high school guidance counselor used to spout at us. Back in 1986 and 87, when I was a tadpole at Robert W. Traip Academy in Kittery, Maine, my guidance counselor was Phil Cheney, and Phil didn’t like the military much. Seems he’d had a shitty enlistment in the Army and thereafter thought that anyone considering the military was wasting their time and his. Unless you said you were going off to college he had nothin’ for you…

He had my buddy Chris Cunningham in his office and looked at him across the table and asked imperiously,” So, what are Christopher’s plans after graduation?” to which Chris said,” I dunno. He’s across the table from you so why don’t you ask him?” I was called in and was promptly dismissed after telling him I was headed into the military after graduation instead of off to college.

Chris went on to college after his enlistment in the Marines. I went to college after the Army. In fact, pretty much all of us who went into the various service branches after we left Traip went on to college. How do you think we paid for college? Why do you think we’ve all achieved a fair modicum of success in our lives? Because we learned self-confidence and discipline and traveled the world in the service of our nation before we went to continue our educations.

Our school lacked a JROTC program. We were a very small school of 450 kids, too small for a program of our own and besides, Phil Cheney would have rather choked on his necktie than have allowed it. He was verily apoplectic when we complained to the principal to get recruiters into the school to meet with us (we were in cahoots with them anyways, since every last one of us was well-known in the recruiting offices already).

By and large, JROTC programs aren’t necessarily perfect recruiting tools. Statistically, only small numbers of kids enrolled actually enlist and take advantage of the advanced-rank placement status. But the things these kids learn, like confidence and discipline and focus, can keep them goal-oriented, help keep them off drugs, and be their foundation of success in the workplace or in higher education.

Even in a military school, there’s no guarantee that a kid will enlist or take a commission upon graduation. Here in South Carolina, we have our own military college, The Citadel, whose Corps of Cadets lives a 100% military academy lifestyle for their time at the school, but on average only about 30% of the graduates take their commissions upon graduation. The rest enter the civilian workforce with a high degree of success. I read somewhere that about 50% of VMI grads do service time, and also read that about 40% of the graduates of the US Merchant Marine Academy at King’s Point, New York serve in the Navy after graduating while the rest go on to civilian maritime careers.

It’s high time that people quit looking upon those of us who take an oath to defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic, like we’re psychopathic pariahs. Stop demonizing us for having served our country. I mean, hell….on that same criteria of hating us for our service, for doing our honorable duty, shouldn’t you all also be hating cops, firemen, doctors, and nurses, too? Just hate everyone who gives of themselves without you and your Socialist programs taking it from us.

Saturday, April 25, 2009

I'm sad...Bea Arthur died.

Y'know, the death of Bea Arthur really makes me sad. I grew up on her dry sarcasm on "Maude" in the 70's, and it continued in the 80's on "The Golden Girls". I love dry sarcasm, and she was a master of the art. Rest in peace, Bea. Semper Fi, Marine.

May 13, 1922 - April 25,2009

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Even more Conservative T-shirts!

A couple weeks back I let ya'll know about a site with some clever t-shirts with a conservative bent to counter all those rediculous and annoying Obama t-shirts all the KoolAid drinkers are wearing.


Yesterday I received a note from Paul over at Shirts Backwards letting me know that he just started a site with additional conservative designs, and I'd like to toot his horn and send you in his direction. The designs are pretty cool, and he generously has bigger tee sizes for those among us who like big shirts instead of cheap-assed rags that shrink up to wash-cloth dimensions after 2 washes.

I rather like the one that states that Obama does not equal Lincoln; Guest Blogger Jim will love that one since he loves to refer to him tongue-in-cheek as "The Lincoln of Our Times". My wife loved the "57 States of Obamerica". Go check out the shirts today!


Saturday, April 18, 2009

Who dat is? Dat just my baby daddy, times 14

We here at Global Domination Through Applied Inactivity strongly encourage deadbeat dads to pay their child support. Furthermore, we encourage people who can’t afford kids to kindly keep their junk in their pants and avoid such situations or at least take responsible countermeasures in direct defiance of the Catholic Church.

Besides, there’s a lot of you out there who simply should not breed, under any circumstances. The gene pool is assed up enough already without further dilution.

My mom had a hard enough time raising me on her own, but the task was made that much more difficult by my own father’s delinquency. Back then, the state wasn’t all that arduous about pursuing court-ordered support, and my mom didn’t push the issue; her philosophy was that if he didn’t want to come around for visitation or pay his part in my upbringing, then piss on him. (Gee, bitter much, Steve? But I digress…)

I have mixed feelings about the way states pursue child support payments these days. I’ve known a few guys, and known of many others, who’ve either had to serve time in jail or been threatened with jail time for getting behind in their payments. Some people are serial deadbeats, and some just fall behind due to the economy. Conversely, I’ve also known moms who are unwilling to work with their exes when they fall into money problems and refuse to work out a solution, and just have the father jailed for spite, and others who refuse to work and just sit back and expect to be taken care of. You can’t lump it al into one blanket statement about every case, since you really need to look at each case individually.

My buddy Chris had a tough go of it economically for a few weeks around the holidays, and was trying hard to make ends meet with his current wife while they awaited the birth of their first child together. While his first wife was a pain in the ass about the support for the child from that marriage, his second wife was extremely reasonable about the support for their two shared children. Thankfully, he was quickly able to get everything caught up again and things are copasetic once more in his universe.

My friend Scott missed a couple months of work in jail on non-payment, and it went on his record as a felony, so now as a convicted felon he can’t own a firearm for self-protection. He had to beg for his job back, and start at the bottom rung again having lost any and all seniority he’d built.

I’m fortunate, I guess, in that I have no biological children. I don’t have that in my life as an issue. Some of you would say that I’ve missed out by not being a parent, but it’s a moot point. Again, I digress…

Authorities in Flint, Michigan say a man who fathered 14 children, all with different women, owes more than $530,000 in unpaid child support. Holy shit, Batman. I know kids are expensive, but dayum.

The man, Thomas Frazier, aged 42, was jailed last week. Court records say he owes six years of support payments. Doing the quick math, that’s an average of $6309.00 per child per year. When you divide that sum out, it’s an average of $525.75 a month, per child. Times 14. Times 6.

The local Flint newspaper says the unemployed man could be held for 90 days if he doesn't pay $27,900. Sure thing, man. Don’t we all just have a spare thirty large kicking around in a coffee can for a rainy day? Can a brother get a bailout? Hey, Congress, how about the Baby Daddy Stimulus Package?

Frazier owes one woman about $40,000 for a 14-year-old daughter. A Genesee County judge ordered Frazier to spend 90 days in jail unless he comes up with $4,100 for her.

Even if he comes up with that money, the judge ordered him to spend 90 days in jail on another case. On top of that, the judge gave him 45 days jail on six other cases. In all, Frazier is looking at three months in jail unless he comes up with at least $27,900.

Frazier says he thinks he fathered only three of the children and that it's unrealistic for authorities to expect him to pay child support that was $3,000 a month at one point. What average working stiff makes that in a month?

Frazier remains held at the Genesee County Jail. It wasn't immediately clear if he had a lawyer who could speak for him. And even if he did, how he’d pay that lawyer is uncertain.

Does it really serve anybody any good to jail someone who is behind on his child support? I mean, if you’re in jail, you aren’t working, and if you aren’t working, then you sure as hell aren’t makng any money to pay the support, right? And while you’re in jail, you’re most likely LOSING YOUR JOB, and that doesn’t exactly help the situation, since you now no longer have a job to pay the payments. And when you get out of jail, you still have to pay up, and now you’re farther behind, plus the money accrued as you sat in jail not making any money. So of course, you’re even farther behind, and then they jail you again because you’re farther behind, and thusly a cycle is perpetuated into a vicious circle.

How much is your state spending on chasing down deadbeats?

And then you have a broke-ass guy taking up space in an already overcrowded jail, space better spent on rapists and child molesters and murderers, plus the cost to feed, clothe, and house that guy in the aforementioned overcrowded jail.

And to think, my insurance covered my vasectomy… my co-pay for the initial consult was $35.00, and the doc billed my procedure as in-office, so that was another $35.00 co-pay, for a total of $70.00 and another 99 cents for a bag of frozen peas (don’t ask). Or, a big box of condoms runs you under 15 bucks if you don’t want to get snipped.

Take responsibility, or pay the price one way or another.

As a post-script, Frazier is no angel. He remained under the radar until late last month when he got pulled over in Iowa for a broken taillight on his Mercedes.

In his pocket, police found $5,000 in cash and plane tickets to Florida. Frazier said he is unemployed and local officials said they do not know what he does for a living.

The cop tossed him in jail on child support warrants and then had him delivered Wednesday to the Genesee County Jail. His current jail term aside, Frazier is also looking at further legal woes for his probation violation cases.

Genesee County Prosecutor David Leyton is not in a forgiving mood, noting that Frazier was rolling around in a Mercedes Benz with thousands of dollars and plane tickets at the same time he wasn't paying his child support.

We should set him up on a date with the OctoFruit, Nadya Suleman. Together they’ll have 28 kids, enough to start a football team.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

How can you NOT convict this guy?

Earlier in the week, rock legend Phil Spector was convicted of second-degree murder in the shooting death of actress Lana Clarkson. Spector claimed it was a suicide, but I guess the jury decided that people seldom go to a guy's house on a first meeting and shoot themselves in the mouth. His first trial ended in a mistrial and finally six years after the fact, he gets to look at the possibility of the next 15 years in prison.....a far cry from producing "Be My Little Baby" by the Ronettes.

His next big hit single will be "Be My Little Bitch" by the Tyronettes.....

I'll miss the parade of hair though. This shit is priceless.

Sad Meal Update: Evidence of my Genius

As you might recall, I made mention of various sauces to accompany the Sad Meal.

In searching the Web, I found that my ideas aren't really all that far off the mark after all....there already exists a Wasabi sauce in Asia.

So the next time your kid acts up, feed the little bugger a SadMeal™. You'll feel better knowing that they're miserable as you enjoy yourself.

Ba-da-da-da-daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.....they're hatin' it!

You followin' me? 'Cause we can't do this all day.....

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Have they issued a Fatwa against me yet?

No sooner do I point out how Afghanistan is one of the most ass-backwards places on Earth than they go and verily prove my case for me yet again. I mean, how bad of a shit-hole do you have to be living in to try to escape into Iran?

Officials said yesterday that Taliban gunmen used a firing squad to kill a young couple in a lawless, militant-controlled section of southern Afghanistan for trying to elope, shooting them with rifles in front of a crowd, for trying to elope. I'm serious.

The woman, 19, and the man, 21, were accused by the militants of immoral acts, and a council of conservative clerics decided that the two should be killed. Oh, yes, the Religion of Peace strikes again.

The two had fled their homes and hoped to travel to Iran, that bastion of freedom, but their parents sent other villagers to bring them home. Details were sketchy, but reports say that once back home, the pair was either turned over to the Taliban by their parents or the militants came and took them by force. Either way, they were soon shot by some dudes with AK’s.

The Afghan government has no access to the remote region where the two were shot, said Jabar Pardeli, the provincial police chief of Nimroz Province. Yeah, Nimroz; I’m not making this up. The province has a police chief though, so supposedly some sort of government trickles down that way.

Not to be outdone, though, Saudi Arabia takes absurdity to an even sicker level.

On Saturday, for the second time since December, a court in the Saudi town of Unaiza upheld the marriage of an 8-year old Saudi girl to a much older man, on the condition that he does not have sex with her until she reaches puberty.

Please, chew that morsel a minute before you choke on it. It leaves a rather foul aftertaste, no?

You see, financial problems prompt some Saudi families to marry off their underage daughters to much older men, a practice the kingdom's chief cleric Grand Mufti Sheikh Abdelaziz Al al-Sheikh endorses. Media reports claim that the 8 year-old girl's father arranged the marriage in exchange to clear his debts with the man.

But the dude promised to not have sex with her till she hits puberty. Yeah, sure. This after Afghan clerics said it’s okay to demand sex every 4 days, according to the Koran. So, my question to ya’ll is this: do you really think this pedophile asstard is gonna wait a few years to take what Allah says is his? If she says no, he can have her beaten or killed or both. Hell, he might just do it because she’s not progressing to puberty fast enough. No, way…that poor girl is doomed, and we can thank not only her asshole father but the shitbag clerics who twist around the already-twisted teachings in the Koran.

Maybe the White House will issue a terse statement? Maybe there will be a stern warning from Number 10 Downing Street? Maybe the U.N. will huff and puff and threaten a sanction or two? Or maybe, as usual, no one will do jack diddly shit in the name of appeasement and keeping that oil flowing.

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Marital Rape is Okay!!! Allah Says So!!!

Boy, it must truly suck to be Hamid Karzai.

In case you’ve been living under a rock, His Islamic Excellency The Honorable Hamid Karzai is the President of The Islamic Republic of Afghanistan.

On one hand he’s trying to bring his nation out of the Stone Age and at least into being Third World and not Sixth World, but he has to deal with tribes and clans and warlords and an economy based upon the sole cash crop being opium poppies to make heroin, and a society based upon an insanely strict adherence to Islam that keeps his country’s women enslaved and men too afraid to do anything remotely Western or modern so that they may as well still be living in caves as hunter-gatherers looking for a herd of Baluchatherium to spear for dinner. Oh wait, it’s 2009; they’d hunt wooly mammoths with an RPG.

He’s trying to help America fight the Taliban and Al-Qaeda, but he can’t be seen to help too much because if he does he’ll get a truck bomb delivered to his doorstep in the name of Allah and Mohammed his Prophet, blessed be their names, yadda yadda yadda.

And it’s really hard to be taken seriously on the world stage when you have asshats like Mohammad Asif Mohseni making your country and Islam as a whole look like total uncivilized douchebags by publicly supporting a law that critics say legalizes marital rape and rolls back women's rights and who rejected an international outcry as foreign meddling, insisting the law offers women many protections.

The law, passed last month, says a husband can demand sex with his wife every four days unless she is ill or would be harmed by intercourse, and regulates when and for what reasons a wife may leave her home alone. Yeah, Allah forbid that a woman should slip her chains, unhook her collar and leash, and actually go outside. And since when has Islam cared a whit whether a woman was harmed?

"It is essential for the woman to submit to the man's sexual desire," the law says. (By force, I guess.)

The legislation raises again the specter of the militant Taliban regime, which fell in 2001 after the U.S. invaded Afghanistan. The Taliban required women to wear all-covering burkas and banned them from leaving home without a male relative. Of course, that relative might not be the right relative and both might be killed out of hand, depending upon which insane cleric has a bug up his ass that day.

Following an international uproar over the new law President Karzai put it under review. The move puts enforcement on hold, at least until some more car bombs can be built.

Mohammad Asif Mohseni, the aforementioned top Afghan cleric and one of the law's main drafters, said the legislation cannot be revoked or changed because it was enacted through a legislative process — passed by both houses of parliament and signed by Karzai. Oops. Shit, oh dear.

"The Westerners claim that they have brought democracy to Afghanistan. What does democracy mean? It means government by the people for the people. They should let the people use these democratic rights," Mohseni told reporters in the capital, Kabul.

Well, shitfire. Using our own democracy against us. We just got served.

Surrounded by supporters, Mohseni unfurled reams of paper with hundreds of women's signatures and thumbprints backing the law. The legislation came out of three years of debate and revision involving both Islamic scholars and members of parliament, Mohseni said. Most of those thumbprints came from thumbs hacked off of women whose hands were showing from under their burkas, though.

Afghanistan is an Islamic state and its constitution defers to the Koran as the ultimate authority, of course, regardless of what the Western world would prefer. Mohseni said the law simply reiterates rules from Islam's holy book.

"In Shariah law, it states that a woman cannot go out without the permission of her husband," he said. He argued that the law is permissive because it allows a woman to go out for a medical emergency or other urgent reason without asking. She’ll just be beaten or stoned after she gets out of the hospital. But hey, she was allowed to go to the hospital, right? That’s progress!

Mohseni said much of the uproar has come from people misinterpreting the law. He said a woman can refuse sex with her husband for many reasons beyond illness, including fasting for Ramadan, preparing for a pilgrimage, menstruating, or recovering from giving birth. Refusal, however, will result in death, or worse.

Though the law only applies to the country's Shiite population, which is 10 percent to 20 percent of Afghanistan's 30 million people, Mohseni, the country's top Shiite cleric, said most of the articles could also be applied to Sunnis. A prominent Sunni cleric, Mawlawi Habibullah Ahsam, said the rules about women submitting to sex and leaving the home would also be acceptable to Sunnis. Well, holy shit. You mean we finally get Sunni and Shiite Muslims to agree on something besides hating each other and hating Jews and hating us, and it’s to say okay to treating your women as slaves? Yeah, that’s progress, baby!

Dozens of Afghan lawmakers and officials condemned the legislation, saying it encourages re-Talibanization. And then they immediately began fearing for their lives for speaking up.

Much has improved for women since the fall of the Taliban. Millions of girls now attend school, and many women own businesses. Of 351 parliamentarians, 89 are women. But in the conservative country, critics fear those gains could easily be reversed. Of course they can…governmental overthrow is always just a few car bombs away.

Mohseni argued that women and men are very far from equal in today's Afghanistan and should not be treated as such. He said many rural women are illiterate and would not be able to find work. Men are typically expected to provide for their wives and children.

"For all these expenses, can't we at least give the right to a husband to demand sex from his wife after four nights?" he said.

Dude, the reason women and men aren’t equal is because of people like you who keep them chained up as cattle. They’re illiterate because you Sharia Law dickbags keep them from going to school, or to work, or beyond the 19th century.

Religion of peace…whoo hooo!!!!

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Look at the pretty AAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHH!!! HELP!!!

Why are people so damned stupid?

There’s a reason why animals in zoos are kept in special enclosures. That’s because many of Mother Nature’s wild animals are born with the innate instinct to kill things placed in front of them. Whether it kills to eat or to defend their territory or to establish dominance, not everything in the zoo is all warm & fuzzy. This is also why non-domesticated animals, by which I refer to anything that isn’t a doggie, kitty, goldfish, or parakeet, make piss-poor pets.

Hanging out with tigers and chimps and bears often gets pet owners killed. Jumping into an enclosure in a zoo with angry baboons or Komodo Dragons or what have you often gets you killed. Swimming with seals off the California coast wearing a wetsuit & flippers makes you look like a seal and often gets you a face to face with a Great White.

Y'know, these warnings are there for a reason...

And yet, you idiots persist in doing it, and then when the little beasties gnaw your limbs off you say it’s not the animal’s fault….

Well, you’re right; it’s not the fault of the animal because the animal is doing what animals do. It’s YOUR fault, you silly simple shits, for not respecting the fact that while it may look cute, it will KILL YOU.

To whit, I bring you the priceless picture of some asstard in Germany who jumped a fence, a line of prickly hedges, and a wall in order to swim towards the pretty polar bears in the Berlin Zoo this weekend.

This, my friends, is what we call: EPIC FAIL

Sunday, April 5, 2009

The First Annual State of the Blog Address

Well, this should be fun. I get to toot my own horn a bit I guess and let everyone know what’s been going on with this blog.

Why do I even do this? Why do I write?

Because I’m an opinionated loudmouth, I suppose. I see and hear things all day that I just have to vent about. It’s way cheaper than therapy. I love to write; always have ever since I was a kid. I'm too lazy to be a standup comic. It exercises my mind a little and I really do hope that the people who stop by my little corner of the Interwebz decide to come back and visit again, having left a little more informed, or at least amused and entertained.

And speaking of my readers, I really do want to thank all of you who come here to see what shenanigans my deviant little mind comes up with next. I’m exceptionally grateful to my subscribers both on Blogspot and on MySpace. A special shout-out goes to Randy Barnett, who was one of my first regular readers/commenters from outside my usual suspects and continues to read me regularly.

I used to wonder if anyone outside my immediate circle of friends and family ever read my labors of love, and then I installed a feed widget (Feedjit, actually) that has been a total godsend. And then I installed a counter, too. Turns out that I get between 500 and a thousand hits a week! I’d say better than 2/3 of my traffic is from people coming to look at the insane pictures I create and/or caption to go along with my blogs. Every day I’m fascinated by the various locales that my site has been visited from.

To date, I’ve been visited from every state (except I think New Hampshire, dunno why) and every part of Canada except Newfoundland/Labrador and the Yukon Territory. A very heartfelt thank you to the visitor from Kuglugtuk, a town of 1,300 on the Arctic Ocean in the province of Nunavut. It was very cool to see a visit from there.

I’ve been visited by at least 90 countries, which just utterly blows my mind. I’ve seen traffic from:
China (yeah, mainland communist China)
Costa Rica
Czech Republic
Dominican Republic
Hong Kong (not really a country but still not a standard Chinese locale)
Kuala Lampur
Puerto Rico (again, not a country but they act like it)
Reunion Island
Saudi Arabia
Scotland (to me, it’s a separate country. Alba go Bragh!)
South Africa
South Korea
Sri Lanka
Trinidad & Tobago
And several APO/FPO military sites in Europe and the Pacific. Hooah!

I always smile when I get a visit from a Muslim country, since many of my posts are critical of radical Islam, and I’m surprised when I get a hit from a country known for oppression, like Vietnam, China, Venezuela, and Iran. I hope you enjoy the freedom of speech that I employ. I’ve managed to get most of the former Yugoslavia to visit, too. They might not agree on a common religion or borders, but Serbia, Slovenia, Croatia, Bosnia, and Macedonia all agree that “GDTAI” is the most happening spot on the web. We just need to convince Kosovo and Montenegro next. And it was really neat to get a hit from Reunion Island, a small nation and French territory off the eastern coast of Africa, past Madagascar and Mauritius in the Indian Ocean.

Recently, I had a couple posts picked up by Topix and Buzztracker, a couple of websites that act as aggregators for global news, and I was surprised to find myself listed on the Technorati website too. And back at the beginning of the year I wrote a roundup of the best music I’d found in 2008, and as my song of the year I picked “Nostalgia”, by Mirror. Can you imagine my shock at finding that the man behind the music, Thomas Anselmi, had read my blog post and had even mentioned it along with a link on the band’s website? That was very validating and really made my day.

I recently started partnering with some of my old Army buddies who blog occasionally but don’t have their own sites. It’s a bit different to be acting as editor as well as a writer, but having additional material on the site only makes it stronger. Plus, it’s great to collaborate with guys I’ve known for 20 years, and it gives me a chance to play with even more of my insane pictures.

My blog was never intended to become quite as political as it has. Actually, it was just supposed to be looks at everyday life and the things that made my head explode. However, with the country the way it is, I find myself writing more about the absurdity of Washington. Bear with me; I have every intention of continuing my non-political works! I’ll soon be writing about music, TV, and books again, I promise.

A big shout-out too goes to Crys, who patiently gives me time to write, even when she'd rather have me over on the love seat watching TV with her.

Thanks for reading. I’d probably still write even if no one read it, but knowing that you’re all out there makes it all worthwhile. Global Domination Through Applied Inactivity: taking the world by storm, eventually, when we get around to it.

The author deep in thought in Charleston traffic, thinking up another blog post.

And they all said that Bush was ignorant...(with guest blogger Jim)

Cartoons about his big ears. Skits on SNL about his poor grammar. Citizens singing "Hey, hey goodbye" to him at the coronation of The Lincoln of our Times™ (or worse, what with the drubbings the rappers gave him.)Go and see:

George W. Bush couldn't draw breath without the Left telling us how stupid he was. When John Kerry ran against him in ‘04, we found out W had better grades at Harvard than the reluctant Vietnam War "hero". Didn't matter; W was still the buffoon.

In the 2 months since Mr. Lincoln II has gone to Washington, I've seen more dumb shit than I could shake a stick at. Bill Richardson, Kathleen Sebelius, Tom Daschle, Tim Geithner and others---tax cheats. Hillary Clinton blaming gun shows in the US for Mexican-on-Mexican violence in MEXICO. The gift of DVDs to British PM Gordon Brown that can't even be played on European machines (PAL vs. NTSC), giving the Queen an iPOD. Isn't that a stocking stuffer for your kid at Christmas!!!!!???

Hope he didn't pre-load it with Young Jeezy, Flavor Flav, and 2 Live Crew, Your Majesty. (Wouldn’t want the royal ears to hear “Hey We Want Some Pussy)

And just when you thought it couldn't get any worse, Stupid bows to the King of Saudi Arabia. You know, the guy whose cheek W kissed when he visited after 9/11? It’s in all the conspiracy films. Believe it or not, there is a real difference. SUBJECTS bow, FRIENDS kiss checks in their culture. So all Obama did was make himself look subservient to Saudi Arabia in the eyes of pretty much everyone in the Middle East. Way to go, boss. Anyone remember back to their military training? While we saluted foreign officers out of respect, there was a protocol. Our palm down, their palm raised upright, (British, German) because we had defeated them in battle. The Libs tell us this guy/king is our enemy, (and he very well may not completely be our friend 100% of the time. I mean, 15 of 19 hijackers on 9-11 were Saudis) but our self-aggrandizing leader bows to him the first chance he gets. Think I'm bullshitting? Check for yourself at AMERICAN THINKER or on YOU TUBE.

Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe he was having another Special Olympics bowling moment. This guy really looks smooth, suave, and hip, just like the mainstream media portrayed him during the campaign. Actually, I think he’s given birth to a whole new generation of Ugly Americans.
Additional Commentary from MojoSteve:
Yeah. Okay. For a guy who’s supposedly so damned brilliant, Obama has surrounded himself with dolts and tax cheats and Clinton Administration retreads. Half the people he’s nominated to Cabinet positions (some of them newly made up) have had to back out due to failure to pay taxes, and others have survived their tax failures and settled into their seats of power, expecting you & me to play by the rules that they flaunt. Nancy Killefer was gonna be the new Chief Performance Officer (whatever the fuck THAT is) but she’s a tax cheat. Tom “Dash-hole” Daschle withdrew from consideration as Health & Human Services Secretary. New Mexico Governor Bill Richardson was on the short list to for both State and Commerce, and withdrew over a grand jury investigation into ethics and the awarding of contracts to his supporters.

Alleged financial wunderkind Tim Geithner is now the SecTreasury, but is such a financial imbecile that he “accidentally” cheated on his taxes due to an inability to operate TurboTax. Kansas Governor Kathleen Sebelius is the latest nominee to the poisoned post of HHS, and she has tax problems. And what in the HELL is Arizona Governor Janet Napolitano doing as Secretary of Homeland Security? Is this a joke?

She couldn’t keep illegals out of her own state so how in the hell can we expect her to secure the entire nation? Arizona’s biggest import is Mexicans, followed by dope. Arizona’s biggest export to other states is Mexicans, followed by dope. She has the fucking audacity to call the Global War on Terror a “contingency”, and terrorism is now simply a “man-caused disaster”. What kind of politically correct bullshit is that? Why not just call it an Oopsie, or a Mildly Unpleasant Misunderstanding?

And Shrillary Clinton…her and Obama were at each other’s throats all through the elections, and now they play all nicey-nice as she kow-tows to various foreign hosts and places all the blame for Mexico’s drain-circling on our shoulders. Maybe she’s just purposely assing it up to make Obie look bad?

And lest we forget Barney “Buddy Hackett” Frank and Nasty Nancy Pelosi and Dianne Feinstein and Dirty Harry Reid…and that embarrasment Joe Biden...gawd, it took 233 years to get us here as a nation, and less than 90 days to derail the American Dream. Hope and Change!!! Yes We Can!!!

Hey, David Letterman; for 8+ years W has been mentioned in 90% of your lame-assed Top Ten Lists as the butt of your Liberalisms. When can we expect to see you adding your new Lord & Master to the lists?