Crime is Down, except in my town...

I came across a rather interesting article on FOX yesterday. Conservative Scalawag beat me to the punch on mentioning it, though. Kudos, sir.

WASHINGTON — Unemployment is high, the economy is down. Yet for all the signs of recession, something is missing: More crime.

Experts are scratching their heads over why crime has ebbed during this recession, making it different from other economic downturns of the past half-century. Early guesses include jobless folks at home keeping closer watch for thieves, or extra benefits keeping people from resorting to crime.

Preliminary figures gathered by the FBI for the first six months of 2009 show crime falling across the country — at a time when many experts and police officials had expected crime to rise under the pressure of high unemployment, foreclosures and layoffs.

Murder and manslaughter dropped a surprising 10 percent for the first half of the year, according to the FBI's data.

"That's a remarkable decline, given the economic conditions," said Richard Rosenfeld, a sociologist at the University of Missouri-St. Louis who has studied crime trends.

Rosenfeld said he did not expect the 10 percent drop in killings to be sustained over the entire year, as more data is reported. But he said the broad declines are exceptional, given that past recessions have boosted crime rates dating back to the 1950's.

The professor said there are several possible explanations, including that extended unemployment benefits and other government attempts at economic stimulus "have cushioned and delayed for many people the big blows that come from a recession."
Those benefits will have to run out eventually, he cautioned.

Another possible factor is that with more people home from work, it is harder for burglars to break into a home or apartment unnoticed by neighbors, he said.

Rosenfeld said another possibility is that because big cities tend to have an outsize impact on crime statistics, those cities' so-called "smart policing" efforts are still working to drive down rates.

"What you see are the large cities, Chicago, Los Angeles, New York in particular are down considerably, and those large cities are driving the overall change," he said.

Overall, violent crimes fell by 4.4 percent and property crimes dropped by 6.1 percent, according to the data collected by the FBI. Crime rates haven't been this low since the 1960's, and are nowhere near the peak reached in the early 1990's.

The new figures show car thefts also dropped significantly, falling nearly 19 percent and continuing a sharp downward trend in that category. Some believe that big drop in car theft is due largely to the security locking systems installed on most models, as well as more high-tech deterrents like global positioning systems.

The figures are based on data supplied to the FBI by more than 11,700 police and law enforcement agencies. They compare reported crimes in the first six months of this year to the first six months of last year.

The early 2009 data suggests the crime-dropping trend of 2008 is not just continuing but accelerating. In 2008, the same data showed a nearly 4 percent drop in murder and manslaughter, and an overall drop in violent crime of 1.9 percent from 2007 to 2008.

According to the FBI figures, reports of violent crime fell about 7 percent in cities with 1 million or more people. But in towns with 10,000 to 25,000 people, violent crime ticked up slightly by 1.7 percent.

Each city's data was different, but collectively pointed to less crime in every major category.

Nationwide, rape fell by 3.3 percent and robbery by 6.5 percent. Arsons, which are subject to a variety of reporting standards, declined more than 8 percent.

The FBI's data for New York City shows 204 reported murders in the first half of 2009, compared to 252 in same period last year. By comparison, Oklahoma City saw reported killings increase from 26 to 32, the FBI said. Phoenix, Ariz., saw 10 fewer killings, dropping from 86 in the first half of 2008 to 76 in the first half of this year, according to the data.

Separate statistics compiled by the Justice Department measure both reported and unreported crimes.

Okay…what about the fact that once that imbecile and his cronies took over in Washington, gun sales went through the roof? Maybe crime is down because more people are armed & prepared for self-defense?

Maybe the chronic shortage of ammunition I keep hearing about has meant that the bad guys can’t get ammo for their cheap, poorly-maintained guns that they rob and murder their local citizenry with? Nahhhh, shortages only ever effect the law-abiding citizens. Criminals always find ways to get guns and ammo. Gun control laws only keep law-abiding citizens unarmed & defenseless while criminals just get better armed.

Maybe the economy is so bad that the few bullets that are left in stores are unable to be purchased because the economy is so shitty that no one can afford the ammo to go commit crimes with?

Wouldn’t you think that with Global Warming keeping it so damned hot, and with Al Gore claiming that the earth is a few million degrees just under our feet, that crime would be astronomical due to heat-related insanity?

Then again, you have cops bringing handguns to snowball fights…

But it’s not down everywhere, obviously…like in my backyard.

Unemployment in South Carolina is up…like 12.3% now. Gun crime in my town is UP. WAY UP. I live in a town of 6500 people 40 miles from Charleston. We’re the county seat for a very rural county of about 39,000. In the past year or so we had a deputy sheriff shot & killed, my wife & I were caught in a shooting at a gas station that ended with 11 arrests, one wounded (and armed) juvenile, and yours truly with a 9mm hole in his quarter-panel 8 inches from my kneecap. Being a law-abiding gun owner (and slacker who hasn’t gotten his concealed carry permit), my .45 was at home.


We’ve had a lady murdered in her driveway. We have had no fewer than 10 shootings, in town and just outside the limits, in the past 8 weeks alone. One of those was a drive by that killed three, including a 20-month-old baby, and sent several others to the hospital. Three assclowns recently broke into an elderly woman’s home and after she fired at the intruders, they maced her & shot her, kidnapped her, stole her car, and left her in the trunk of her car a few miles from my door. She’s recovering and should be just fine.

Beware of Owner: Gun Control means being able to hit your target.

The shitty economy means that I haven’t got the extra money to put towards getting my wife a weapon and getting us both our carry permits. It’ll be $300 to get our permits and then maybe another three or four hundred to get her something she likes and is comfortable with.

Maybe Obama will give me a Homeland Security bailout grant to arm my family? Yeah, right…


Due to economic hardship, it's harder to mack in a pimp ride. However, it's also easier to look like a Tru Playa with a smaller bank roll...

Goodbye, Miz Murphy

I liked Brittany Murphy. She was funny, quirky, cute, talented, and too damned young to die.

Most everyone knows her from her acting, and from cartoon voice-overs. But for the last couple years I've had a song that she recorded as a permanent part of my MP3 player playlist. Not everyone listens to dance club/techno/house music, especially in my over-40 peer group, but I absolutely love the genre, and Brittany Murphy provided some great vocals on the Paul Oakenfold single ,"Faster Kill Pussycat", released in March 2006. The girl had some pipes on her.

My condolences go out to her husband & family.

Rest in peace, Murph. You'll be missed.

Megrahi allegedly circling the drain....again

Okay...perhaps this isn't a very charitable thing to write about at the holidays, but terrorists deserve no mercy, no quarter, and no charity. Period.

According to various sources, terrorist mastermind and UberScumbag Abdel Baset al-Megrahi's health is in decline and deteriorating rapidly. As you'll recall, Megrahi is the convicted mastermind behind the terrorist attack that blew up Pan Am Flight 103 over Lockerbie, Scotland. In all, 270 people were killed in the attack, which coincidentally occured 21 years ago today.

Megrahi was allowed to go free back in August after some dodgy back-room deals with the UK Government that kinda pissed off most of the Western world. This was supposedly because Megrahi was dying from prostate cancer and that this was a compassionate release so he could die at home. They said it would be a low-key release, and this terrorist turd showed up to a festival bigger than the Super Bowl, and I've been watching the seconds tick away to his death with bated breath.

Megrahi,57, arrived at the hospital on Saturday coughing and vomiting, a statement from Tripoli Medical Center said, and that Megrahi's condition has worsened. It seems that his cancer has metasticized and spread throughout his body.


We already missed Hannukah. With any luck maybe we'll be rid of him by Christmas. If there's justice in the universe, then maybe today's the day and on the 21st anniversary of the deed itself, those 270 souls will finally know peace.

Dance a merry jig each time a terrorist goes to meet Allah. See ya!

How to get filthy rich. Follow me to glory!

(note--this post goes hand in hand with the other recent Global Warming Scamfest post )


In today’s craptastic Obamaconomy™, free enterprise is frowned upon and capitalism is a cardinal sin. Until I can find a way to score my own bailout from Obie’s Secret Stash I’ll have to be anti-American and resort to the same entrepeneurial spirit that built this nation and stimulate my own personal slice of the global money market.

If you can’t beat ‘em, don’t join ‘em; change the rules and beat them at their own game, sayeth I.

Friends and dear readers, you now have a wondrous opportunity to join me in filthy lucre and jump on my bandwagon o’ wealth by being a licensed franchisee of The Lightning Man’s Carbon Credit Carnival!

If that Forrest Gump-meets-Jabba the Hutt slug Al Gore can get oodles of ducats from bilking corporations for billions in fake, made-up, contrived carbon offsets by planting trees under the Global Warming battle cry, why the hell can’t I?

I’ve started my own Climate Change Green Corporation, and gathered up ten 55-gallon drums (made from recycled plastic, of course) and filled them with acorns.

Yup, acorns.


Each acorn represents a tree. Once planted, each acorn will sprout into a sturdy oak to offset the evil emissions of industry and progress. I couldn’t determine how many acorns come in a gallon, but a helpful website I found sells gumballs at 850 a gallon, and acorns are about the same size.

Each drum holds 55 gallons of acorns, at approximately 850 acorns per gallon or 46,750 acorns per barrel. That’s nearly 50,000 trees worth of GREEN per barrel. According to some spurious math I read, it takes 36 maple trees to reduce a ton of CO2 a year, and only 6 pine trees. Dunno why. I’ll go with 20 acorns per ton of C02, since all this shit is made up anyways. So each barrel can offset almost 2400 tons of carbon, and the going rate of carbon credits averages about $20.00, so each barrel can sell for about $48,000.00. We’ll round that up to fifty large, based solely on the fact that the barrel is recycled and those morons love words like that. My ten barrels should sell for $500,000, minus costs…See here.


Recycled 55-gallon drums average 55 dollars apiece, so subtract your $550 for the drums. Acorns are free, but gathering them is a bitch. However, most homeless winos I know will do damn near anything for a couple 40-ouncers of Saint Ide’s malt liquor, so if you give them say, two 40’s per barrel, at $2.00 per bottle, you can get your acorns harvested for $40.00, maybe less if they’re on a bad DT jones for that ”mawlt ligga”. That’s even cheaper than using illegal aliens, unless you force them to either pick for free or you’ll call INS. (wait, no one fears INS; Nasty Pelosi says illegals have more rights than Americans anyways. Bitch.)

So for say, six hundred bucks investment, I’ll get you half a million. God, I love capitalism!

Y’know…I’m going about this the wrong way. In the true spirit of Jabba the Global Warming Scam Artist, we actually should be telling people that these are special Magic Acorns and that each tree will scrub 10 tons of carbon, and then we can sell the credits for $5000.00 each. That way your 500,000 acorns yields you 250 MILLION dollars! All for a few shitty beers and plastic barrels. And if you’re in a pinch, Lowe’s sells these 55-gallon green & red storage bins for 25 bucks, cutting your investment in half. If your cost is halved, does that not then double your profits? Holy crap, I’m a genius.



Are we 100% sure our acorns will become viable trees? No. But we can’t very well admit that most experts put the odds of an acorn maturing to treedom at 1 in 10,000. That would mean that we’d really only be selling like 50 carbon credit trees out of our half a million. We’re not lying; simply omitting the negativity.



Sure, we’re not planting an actual germinated & growing sapling. We deal in seeds, which may or may not reach maturity. The acorn may not germinate. It could be eaten by deer or squirrels (See? Hunters are GOOD. They help in the fight against Global Warming by killing those who eat baby trees before they’re even born!) Once it sprouts, a lawn mower could slice it to ribbons. It takes anywhere from 15 to 50 years before an oak reaches full growth & maturity so your return on investment as far as the miraculous instantaneous scrubbing away of evil CO2 isn’t so immediate after all.

All of these things can be overcome in your sales pitches to customers by deft avoidance, the use of clever snappy catch phrases like “Hope”, “Change”, “Let Me Be Clear”, or the ever popular “Yes We Can” (or “Si, podemos” when selling to our Hispanic brethren). If resistance to the sale is still met, counter it with “George Bush hates trees. Buying our carbon offsets is the greatest way to get back at Bush and his war-mongering, teabagging lackeys. ¡Vivé la Revolución!”. Then you just salute, say “Heil Obama!”, and the sale is yours.

Y’know why we can call them Magic Acorns and sell them for five grand a pop? Because we said so. We’re the self-proclaimed experts and industry leaders in what’s quickly become a 60 billion dollar a year business. There’s big money in Global Warming, dontcha’ know? So, what we say goes. How can we be so sure that each of our Miracle Trees will offset 10 tons of carbon? We can’t. It’s an arbitrary number we picked because it sounded good. The science behind all of this global warming and climate change and carbon credit green movement bullshit is dubious at best and outright fantasy at worst, so as long as it sounds good, let’s run with it.




Global Warming, my ass. The entire northeastern third of the nation is under a foot of snow from the second blizzard in a week’s time, with winter still officially a day away. That Man They Elected (I can’t even call him the President anymore, I’m so utterly disgusted) was more or less laughed at in Carbonhagen, and those who didn’t laugh were pissed off that he didn’t come groveling and apologizing and offering the New World Order more tribute money. Those fucksticks from the White House knelt beforee the Global Warming Altar with a bribe of $30 BILLION immediately in “emergency climate aid” to needy countries, and $100 BILLION dollars a year of American taxpayer money, and they wanted more. We’re trillions of dollars in the hole, and the idiots offer up billions more, and the greedy world whores wanted more from us. Well, piss off, World. Piss off, Green Movement. Piss off, dumb-asses of the Obama Administration.

Where the hell is this money coming from? There’s NO MONEY LEFT, you assclowns. You’ve pissed it all away on TARP and Cash for Clunkers and bailouts and buying GM and myriad other bullshit follies, and then flitted off to pick up your Nobel Prize, and then went back to the scene of the crime to what you thought would be a hero’s welcome. Instead, they turned on you. Instead of a couple hundred nations kissing your ass, you only struck deals with, what? Five?

How deliciously ironic that you had to fly home with your tail tucked and landed your precious personal taxi, Air Force One, in the middle of a blizzard. Happy Global Warming, asshole.


So, who’s with me? Who wants a franchise? I have plenty of crackheads and winos locally in my state’s 12.3% unemployment pool just itching to pick up acorns for cheap hooch. Why should the Democrats and the EnviroDouches be the only ones to profit from this goat rope?

No, I'm not dead....just frozen

No, those are not bogeys in my facial hair. Those are actual ice crystals formed from exhaling at -20 degrees F (-28 C for my metric friends)


Salutations, dear readers!

My humblest of apologies for not writing as much these past couple weeks. As is usually the case when I'm shy on material, it generally means that work has interfered with pleasure. Getting up at 2:30AM and starting work in a -20 degree freezer isn't conducive to my writing.

I had a lot of fun with the Global Warming blog, though....if you missed it, give it a read and laugh a little. Look two posts below this one....

Anyways, I'm on vacation all of next week, and I should be able to put up some good stuff for you guys to peruse and enjoy.

They Let Gay People Be Mayor?

Stolen from Fox News:

Voters are deciding Saturday whether Houston will become the largest U.S. city to elect an openly gay mayor.

The runoff election in the Texas city pits City Controller Annise Parker against former city attorney Gene Locke.

Parker is a lesbian who has never made a secret or an issue of her sexual orientation.

But in recent weeks, anti-gay activists and conservative religious groups have endorsed the 61-year-old Locke and sent out mailers condemning Parker's "homosexual behavior."

Meanwhile, gay and lesbian political organizations around the country have rallied to support the 53-year-old Parker.

My God, people. This is a non-story. Why should any of us really, truly, give a milli-shit about whether a candidate is gay? It's irrelevant.

Can the candidate DO THE JOB they were elected to do? Can the candidate do the job BETTER than their opponent? Do you feel that, based solely on the candidate's ability to serve and lead, and based solely on their political policies & beliefs, that they can adequately represent you in Congress or run your city? THAT is the criteria I look for in a candidate.

Can they bring jobs? Can they lower crime rates? Can they keep taxes low?

What's important?

Grow up.

The Global Warming ScamFest

If ever you wondered at the gullibility of the average human being, or even the sheer unadulterated stupid ignorance of people in the face of overwhelming information, look no further than what most call Global Warming, and the scam artists call Climate Change. It’s what I’ve taken to calling Climate Fuckery.

There’s currently a 12-day worldwide Festival of Weather-Related Bullshittery going on in Copenhagen, Denmark. Seemingly, we’re all supposed to call it Kooben-hoggin now, since the established pronunciation I grew up on (KO-pen-Hay-gun) has been usurped by the Left. Alleged experts, hand-wringers, and Chicken-Little-Sky-Is-Falling types are gathered in Carbonhagen at the behest of the United Nations to seemingly spend money and be a raving batch of hypocrites and self-righteous assholes.

This is the same United Nations that spent millions of dollars partially earmarked for relief aid to give some artsy dickhead free reign to squirt paint on the ceiling and call it a masterpiece.
See here.

The UN is already a colossal waste of money and is about as effective as a daddy-longlegs with all 8 legs yanked off, and here they are shitting away $125 million dollars in a mutual mental masturbation session geared towards making industrialized nations feel guilty for developing past the invention of fire and the wheel, and fleecing said nations for billions in aid (spelled g-r-a-f-t).

I find it hard to sympathize with shitheads who want me to drive a fucking toaster to work, yet came to Koobenhoggin in 120 private jets and are tooling around Denmark in over 1200 rented limos and other luxury rides. Delegates were seen driving up to the conclave in Beemers, Benzes, VoVos, and Jags, while the rented bus rolled about empty. I mean, who wants to ride the bus when you have every luxury car in Denmark (and more are being brought in from Germany and Sweden) at your disposal? France alone ordered 42 cars from the city’s largest limo rental agency, according to company spokesperson Majken Friss Jorgensen. And Jorgensen added that just five vehicles in the fleet will be hybrids, which are nearly impossible to procure in tax-heavy Denmark.

Ahhhh, gotta love assloads of taxes to pay for free healthcare, no?

The conference center hosting the meetings has set up four "climate kitchens" to cook healthy, organic meals for attendees, but they aren't coming cheap. Visitors ordering the regular meal will get finger sandwiches, a quiche, some cheese and dessert, but those going "deluxe" get a mini croissant, canapé with smoked salmon, mini pizzas, fancy cheese and some pineapple in chocolate — all for an estimated $40 a person.

These same Global Warming dickheads want to tax people on cow farts, claiming that bovine flatulence pollutes the air with methane clouds as they themselves visit the White House to dine on Wagyu beef. Sure, as if hand-fed cows from Kobe, Japan who get their balls massaged and listen to Yanni, don’t ever fart…

People are still buying into this bullshittery, even after hundreds of scientists, actual accredited climatologists, have debunked Global Warming as a myth. Within the past couple weeks, hundreds of emails surfaced from people within the Climate Research Unit at East Anglia University (one of the movement’s breeding centers) that basically admit that it’s all a scam. Hell, just today it’s come to light that there exists a text that basically stated that screws developing nations in favor of letting rich nations do as they please. The text says it would allow rich nations to emit nearly twice as much carbon per capita as poor countries. That abandons the principle of the Kyoto protocol, which calls for the richer nations to take on the bulk of the burden. The document—thought to be the product of a group that includes the US, UK, and Denmark—also would weaken the UN's role in future climate change negotiations, and pretty much keeps poor nations poor and rich nations rich. Lovely.

The UN doesn’t want to be out-scammed, you see. They’ve been sucking money out of most of the civilized world for over sixty years, and now they’ve come up against a better scam operation. And, ladies & gentlemen, that better scam is Global Warming, and one of their revenue schemes is Carbon Credits/Offsets.

Ostensibly, to offset my release of greenhouse gases I’m beseeched to purchase carbon credits from some mysterious Al Gore-sponsored Carbon Credit Clearing House, or some such nonsense. I mean, I tried to look the shit up and got even more confused. I think some hippy is supposed to plant a tree or something for me. I dunno. I give them millions of dollars to offset a ton of emitted carbon dioxide, and after overhead and skimming, some unwashed granola-muncher in a woven hemp Baja poncho and Birkenstocks plants a tree? Okay.

Al Gore…that fat slug lives in a McMansion that uses more electricity to light than some small cities, and I’m supposed to give this asshole my money for trees? Who appointed him Keeper of the Forests?


The giant, steaming, open-faced shit sandwiches these people keep trying to feed us are incredible, with lie heaped upon lie, served with a dollop of half-truths to sweeten the turds. Gore himself prattles on about how all the glaciers in the world are melting and in doing so are tainting the world’s drinking water supplies.

How? I don’t get it. Maybe my lack of an Ivy League education has stunted me from figuring out how pure glacial water would taint anything. One source I looked at stated that glaciers contain about 75% of the world’s fresh water. I mean sure, animals walked on it and probably shat on it and before it froze it probably scrubbed the atmosphere before condensing, but wouldn’t any legit bottler filter & purify the water regardless of source? Then again, bottled water is a scam, too. Most of it is straight tap water; the same tap water the effete enviro-dicks say is bad for you. Bottled water bars have sprung up in all the hipster districts, from Paris to Los Angeles. Some fine hotels now offer the services of "water sommeliers" to advise diners on which water to drink with different courses. Douchebags.


Gore further rants that 40% of our ice has melted & the rest will be gone in a decade. Really? Hundreds of thousands of square miles of ice is gonna just evaporate inside of 10 years? Wow. Shit-fire! I better get Kevin Costner’s “Waterworld” boat ready for action, ‘cause we’s abouts to be submerged!

Recently Kevin Anderson, the director of the Tyndall Center for Climate Change (a key player in the Climate Research Unit scandal), was quoted as saying that only 10% of humanity will survive global warming. I guess that’ll be the 10% who get rich off the 90% they scammed into destitution. Another alleged climate expert, Rajendra Pachauri, was quoted as saying that the Western Lifestyle is unsustainable.

Ahhh, there we go. There’s the crux of it. Everyone hates the fact that in the West, i.e.: America, you can drive where you want, when you want, and buy what you want, because we’re an industrialized, developed world leader, and everyone else wants us to ride donkeys and eat tree bark.

Even the BBC has lost its mind, reporting that: "Climate 'Is a Major Cause' of Conflict in Africa,” stating that "Climate has been a major driver of armed conflict in Africa, research shows - and future warming is likely to increase the number of deaths from war." Total bollocks!

Tell you what, Beebs…most of Africa has been trying to kill each since the first over-developed super-chimp named Australopithecus picked up a rock & bashed his neighbor in the grape, if for no other reason than the neighbor had something he wanted. As many as a million Rwandans have been killed in Hutu-vs.-Tutsi genocide, and that had nothing to do with the weather and everything to do with political ideology. The situation in the Congo, where up to four million have died in their never-ending series of civil wars, ethnic cleansings, and mass rapes, has nothing to do with whether or not it’s cold out and everything to do with gold, diamonds, and political corruption.


Grow up; occasionally a person will snap on a hot day & commit a violent act but people willingly & gleefully kill each other for power, wealth, and that all-time favorite, religion. Millions did not die in The Crusades over Climate Change. Millions did not die at the hands of Hitler because of the weather. The Khmer Rouge in Cambodia didn’t execute a vast segment of their population over whether or not a glacier was melting. Mass graves all throughout Serbia, Croatia, and Bosnia were not filled by folks not driving a hybrid. Global Warming didn’t fly planes into the World Trade Center.

Gold. Diamonds. Oil. Power. Religion. Greed. Corruption. Not the weather…

How can you say that, Steve? We have to stop Greenhouse Gases!!!!!

Yeah, sure. I’m all in favor of clean air and less industrial pollution. But let’s take a look at Greenhouse Gases, shall we? You Global Warming Fucksticks want to tax me on carbon dioxide and expect me to buy you off so you can plant a tree to offset my crimes? Dude, trees need carbon dioxide to make oxygen via photosynthesis, don’t they? I inhale their oxygen and exhale carbon dioxide, and they take my carbon dioxide and make oxygen. Circle of life, no? You fruitbags seem to forget that the most abundant of the greenhouse gases is…..water vapor. Yeah, plain old water vapor and ya’ll say it’ll kill us all….and all the while you want me to drive around in a car powered by a wee little hydrogen bottle….a hydrogen bottle that emits…say it with me now, kids….water vapor. That makes perfect sense.

But what about the polar bears? We have to save the polar bears!

Oh, yes…the polar bears. Every few weeks someone brings up the polar bears, whether it be to say the bears are all starving, or the bears are eating their babies, or the bears are drowning, or the bears are all already dead, or there’ll be bears killing and eating pedestrians in Central Park any second now due to a lack of food. People, wake up. Polar bears, and many other creatures, often kill their young, or the offspring of rivals. When a new male lion takes over a pride, it generally kills the cubs off to repopulate with his own seed. No one blames that on Global Warming. And I’m pretty damned sure that greenhouse gases didn’t cause my hamster to eat its babies when I was 7 years old. Last I read, the polar bear population was up almost 25% from their levels in the 1950’s. Pick a new animal to lie about, shitheads. You folks just keep perpetuating that image that polar bears are small & cute & cuddly, and they go sledding & drink Cokes with their babies at Christmas time. But polar bears are huge and vicious and have no qualms about eating you. Besides, fewer polar bears means more baby harp seals to club!


Isn’t it a bit ironic that we’ve got 2/3 of the country buried under a foot of snow, 2 weeks before winter officially arrives, and Al Gore’s over in Koobenhoggin charging idiots a thousand bucks apiece to get a picture taken with him in the Holy Name of Global Warming? But would we expect any less from the inventor of the Interwebz?

Stay tuned for my own Global Warming Solution, coming soon….


No more water vapor!

Oh yes, he can!

I am pleased to report that Colonel Van T. Barfoot, the retired Army veteran and Medal of Honor recipient that I blogged about a few days ago, has won his fight to keep his flagpole and to keep flying the colors in front of his house.

Hell yes!

Score one for the good guys!

No, you can't fly the American flag anymore

Once again, I have to ask the question: what the hell is wrong with people? When did it become offensive to display the flag of the United States of America on one’s own property?

You’ll recall a couple months back when we brought word of an apartment complex’s management that tried to evict a man for displaying the flag on his vehicle and property. Within days, they changed their tune and Old Glory remained proudly aloft.

(http://www.mojosteve.blogspot.com/2009/10/whats-so-offensive-about-american-flag.html)

This time, there’s more liberal, elitist, bureaucratic bullshittery afoot as a homeowner’s association is taking legal action against a 90-year old veteran of three wars for flying the flag. Retired Colonel Van T. Barfoot isn’t just any veteran, however. Colonel Barfoot received the Medal of Honor during the Second World War.

After raising the Stars and Stripes every day at sunrise and lowering them every day at sunset since he served in the U.S. Army, Barfoot received a letter on Tuesday from the law firm that represents his homeowners' association, ordering him to remove the flagpole from his yard by 5 p.m. on Friday or face "legal action." What a crock.

The homeowners' association at Sussex Square community in Richmond, Virginia told Barfoot that the freestanding, 21-foot flagpole that he put up in September violates the neighborhood's aesthetic guidelines. Barfoot had sought permission to install the pole shortly after he moved into the complex of townhouses, where the grounds are community property, last June. The board denied his request in July. Yeah, if it’s in the least bit unique it doesn’t belong in one of those Stepford communities, where people with jack else to do ride around the neighborhood reporting your every move to the HOA. Grass is too tall…garage door was left open for longer than 10 minutes…you had more than 2 guests over and they parked on the (gasp!)street!

Assholes.

But Barfoot and his family say there is no provision in Sussex Square's rules that forbids erecting flagpoles. And for Barfoot, that's a cause worth fighting for.
"There's never been a day in my life or a place I've lived in my life that you couldn't fly the American flag," Barfoot said in an interview with the Richmond Times-Dispatch.

The association tried to defend its position in a statement released last night, insisting that Colonel Barfoot directly violated its board's July ruling.

"This is not about the American flag. This is about a flagpole," reads the statement from the association, "Colonel Barfoot is free to display the American flag in conformity with the neighborhood rules and restrictions. We are hopeful that Colonel Barfoot will comply."

The statement reminded the public that many American flags hang from homes in the Sussex Square community, and that the board members object only to Barfoot's freestanding flagpole. NOTE: The board members object. No one said the good Colonel’s neighbors objected. A small group of self-important swine who wish to control the masses, including an elderly man who received this nation’s highest award for valor in combat.


But Barfoot says he has always flown the flag from a height: "Where I've been, fighting wars ... military installations, parades, everything else, the flag is vertical. And I've done it that way since I was in the Army," Barfoot told the paper.
"I've flown the flag at my home as long as I can remember," said Barfoot, who lived in rural Amelia County before moving to suburban Richmond. "This is the first time in the last 36 years that I've been unable to put my flag up on the same pole, the same staff and take it down when it's time to come down. I don't have any qualms with [the board's] authority, but the thing about it is that I cannot get enough conversation out of them where we can try to work out a solution," Barfoot said.

Neighbors largely have expressed their support, but he realizes that ultimately it's up to the nine-member association board whether to grant an exception to the rules.

"Emotional torture is what they've done to my father," said his daughter, Margaret Nicholls. "He has lost sleep, he worries about it constantly. He just doesn't understand. He thinks that if it's on his property they can't tell him what to do."

Y’know, this is precisely why I don’t live in a development of cookie-cutter houses with a Home Owner’s Association. You pay umpteen many thousands of your hard-earned dollars in the six figures to buy your house, and then you have to pay dues to the HOA, and various fees to such for the privelege of having some shitbird tell you that your lawn isn’t right, or you can’t park on the street, or you can’t change your own oil, or you can’t have a big party at your place, or you can’t park your boat at your house, or your house isn’t an approved color, or you can’t have a shitty plastic kiddie pool in your back yard, or have holiday decorations, or fly the American flag in a patriotic manner.

I wash my car in my yard, usually with the music on blast. I walk my dogs on my property without a leash. I cut my grass when I deem it needs it. My guests park in my yard off the street. My storage shed’s not the same color as my house.

Colonel Barfoot is showing his pride in America, a nation that he has fought for in three different wars, a nation that he has bled for and received a Purple Heart for. He’s not flying the flag inappropriately or disrespectfully. He’s not flying a pirate flag, a Confederate flag, or a flag from another country. He’s flying our flag, and damn it, there’s nothing wrong with that.

Wanna get ahold of the Home Owner's Association's lawyers?
Coates & Davenport
5206 Markel Road, Suite 200
Richmond VA 23230
Toll Free: (800) 450-8311
Local Phone: (804) 285-7000
General Fax: (804) 285-2849
Real Estate Fax: (804) 285-3426


Wanna call the Home Owner's Association yourself and let fly?
804-740-8795 (possibly disconnected by now)


Colonel Barfoot’s Medal of Honor Citation reads as follows:

For conspicuous gallantry and intrepidity at the risk of life above and beyond the call of duty on 23 May 1944, near Carano, Italy. With his platoon heavily engaged during an assault against forces well entrenched on commanding ground, 2d Lt. Barfoot (then Tech. Sgt.) moved off alone upon the enemy left flank. He crawled to the proximity of 1 machinegun nest and made a direct hit on it with a hand grenade, killing 2 and wounding 3 Germans. He continued along the German defense line to another machinegun emplacement, and with his tommygun killed 2 and captured 3 soldiers. Members of another enemy machinegun crew then abandoned their position and gave themselves up to Sgt. Barfoot. Leaving the prisoners for his support squad to pick up, he proceeded to mop up positions in the immediate area, capturing more prisoners and bringing his total count to 17. Later that day, after he had reorganized his men and consolidated the newly captured ground, the enemy launched a fierce armored counterattack directly at his platoon positions. Securing a bazooka, Sgt. Barfoot took up an exposed position directly in front of 3 advancing Mark VI tanks. From a distance of 75 yards his first shot destroyed the track of the leading tank, effectively disabling it, while the other 2 changed direction toward the flank. As the crew of the disabled tank dismounted, Sgt. Barfoot killed 3 of them with his tommygun. He continued onward into enemy terrain and destroyed a recently abandoned German fieldpiece with a demolition charge placed in the breech. While returning to his platoon position, Sgt. Barfoot, though greatly fatigued by his Herculean efforts, assisted 2 of his seriously wounded men 1,700 yards to a position of safety. Sgt. Barfoot's extraordinary heroism, demonstration of magnificent valor, and aggressive determination in the face of pointblank fire are a perpetual inspiration to his fellow soldiers.

Not long after this action, Barfoot was promoted from Technical Sergeant to Second Lieutenant. Four months later, his unit was in France's Rhone valley when he was ordered to division headquarters and informed that he had been awarded the Medal of Honor. Given the choice of returning to the United States for the ceremony or receiving the medal in the field, Barfoot chose the latter so that his men could be present. Lieutenant General Alexander Patch awarded him the medal in Epinal, France, on September 28, 1944.

What Do I Know?

What do I know?

I mean, I’m a college dropout. I dropped out while carrying a 3.67 on the dean’s list, so I must not be that bright. I lack the effete Ivy-League liberal education of B-Hussein-Obama (Blessed Be His Name) mmmm mmmm mmmm. I was an enlisted soldier, not an officer. I was a Military Policeman, not a member of Military Intelligence. I work a blue collar job. I live in a small town in South Carolina.


What do I know?

One would think that in order to be the alleged Commander in Chief, one of the myriad hats worn by the President of the United States, one would be a rational, intelligent person, surrounded by capable, smart, well-informed advisors.

What do I know?

I know that it’s a complete and utter farce that’s being perpetrated upon the good people of this great nation this evening when that smug Liberal Socialist ass clown dares to place his TelePrompters amongst the Long Gray Line at West Point, as if the United States Military Academy is just a cool backdrop for a photo op, to lie to me and tell me that he’s agonized over sending additional troops to Afghanistan.
He never agonized. He didn’t take his time to mull it over & weigh the options. He slid the troop requests of his appointed in-theater commander onto the back burner in order to spend his time instead on this Socialized Healthcare folly, or jetting to and fro on our dime to bow to foreign heads of state, or to piss more money away on bullshittery.

What do I know?

I know that you just told our enemies when we’re coming, where we’ll be operating, how many we’re bringing, and then you told them when we’re coming home. So now the people who are trying to kill us know the timeline for our deployments, and they can adjust their plans accordingly. They can move about and either prepare hostile welcomes, or they can go further underground and wait us out, since they now know when we’re going to pull the plug and come home.

What do I know?

I know that the kids of America would have been better off watching a Charlie Brown Christmas than watching the Decline and Fall of Western Civilization courtesy of The Obamessiah.